Victoria's Bundle of Joy
by famouscliche
Summary: This story begins in the middle of season two, right after Elka leaves town.
1. Chapter 1

Hi there!  
This story begins when Elka is found guilty.  
I own nothing... obviously.  
This is going to be a Joria story.  
If you don't like it, simply don't read it.  
Otherwise, enjoy! xo

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Had Elka not run away after her guilty sentence, Joy could have thrown her tantrum right after she and her friends left the courtroom the day before, but she was much too concerned about her mother-like figure to huff and puff about her own problems. She knew how to contain her feelings; she had grown up with that training. But if she was honest with herself, she would have admitted that she wasn't crying over Elka's disappearance while trying to fall asleep in her bed the night before. She may have loved Elka like she loved her own mother, but she was not the woman who caused her tears.

No, that was a completely different woman who made her cry. It was her best friend who had her in tears the previous night, and also had her crying now. Joy, Melanie, and Victoria found Elka not too far from Cleveland earlier in the day, and now, that same evening, Joy couldn't fall asleep without crying again, thinking about what happened between them. As the minutes passed like hours, Joy imagined actually sleeping, not thinking about her feelings, but sleep just wouldn't find her.

She sat up; grabbing a tissue and blowing her nose, before she lay back down, watching the clock on her night stand tick slowly, and her tears wet a growing pattern on her pillow.

Joy guessed that she must have worn herself into exhaustion because when she opened her eyes again, the clock read 4:31, three hours after the last time she checked, and she felt extremely dehydrated. She got up weakly, making her way to the kitchen where she saw Victoria in a robe, playing on her Blackberry. Joy turned to head back to her room when a voice called out to her.

"Joy, what are you doing up so early?"

The longer haired woman glared at her and grabbed a glass of water, ignoring the words.

"I know you're not a morning person, but you could at least say hello," Victoria said, turning her attention back to her phone, not wanting to get worked up over Joy's sour attitude.

Joy was seething behind her typical morning demeanor, doing everything she could to not let Victoria get to her. She took a large gulp of her water and as she went to leave the kitchen again, but she turned at the last second and said, "Hello."

Victoria set her phone down, almost feeling the ice from her friend's voice sending a chill down her back. She looked up, seeing the anger on her face, and asked, "What's wrong?"

Gritting her teeth, the eyebrow queen took a breath. "What's wrong? You really don't know what you did?"

"No," Victoria said, now standing, wanting to get closer to Joy. "What? Why are you so upset?"

There was a silent pause before Joy exploded all over the kitchen. "Because every time you think there's a story you can use or an opportunity you can take, you do it and it doesn't matter who you hurt or what the consequences are! I am sick of it! I am so bloody sick of thinking you are my friend when all you're really doing is sticking around me so you can use me! I am done, Victoria! I won't stand to be treated like this anymore!" she yelled before turning to go back up the stairs to her room.

Victoria, now completely shocked and feeling extremely guilty went to try to make things better between them and comfortingly placed a hand on Joy's shoulder to stop her from leaving the room.

"Joy-" she began, before the woman turned around.

"Don't touch me!" she yelled, shaking her hand away violently before storming to her room.

Dumbfounded, Victoria found her way back to the kitchen table where she sat down in a chair, wondering what had caused Joy's fit of anger.


	2. Chapter 2

Around ten the next morning, Joy got up, hoping no one was home, and began to head toward the bathroom. She took a shower and thought about the previous night… or earlier that morning, really. She couldn't believe what she had said to Victoria. She was so hard on her friend. But then again, the other woman deserved it, right? She had been using her… right?

Joy realized that she had been in the shower for quite some time when the water went cold. She got out and dressed quickly, and when she left the bathroom, she ran smack into Melanie.

"Oh! Sorry, Joy! I must be in my own little world!" she exclaimed with a giggle.

"It's okay," she said with a soft smile. "Where are you off to in such a hurry?"

"Shopping! Are you coming with us?"

Joy shook her head. "I don't think so… I really need to get some stuff done around the house today."

"Okay. Do you need anything from the store?" Melanie asked sweetly.

"No, but thank you," she said, forcing a gentle smile before walking back into her bedroom.

She was not in the mood to shop today, especially if Victoria was going to be there. She just didn't have it in her to be a part of it.

She heard a knock on the door and got up, wondering what else Melanie wanted to say, but saw Victoria standing outside instead.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go with us. Melanie said that you weren't interested, but I thought I'd ask you myself," she told Joy sheepishly.

"No, but thank you," Joy said coldly, turning away from her.

"Joy, I don't wanna fight with you. I want to talk about what happened."

"Well, I don't, so have fun shopping," she said, practically pushing Victoria out the door so she could close it.

Victoria was really not sure what had gone wrong, but she thought maybe it was best if she left Joy alone for now.

That didn't last long, though, because when Victoria and Melanie got back from shopping, the actress found her way back to Joy's room, knocking on her door again.

"I don't want to talk," Joy said as soon as she saw the short haired woman.

"I got you something," Victoria offered, holding out a small box for her to take.

"I don't want it," she shrugged, turning around.

"C'mon, Joy, please! I'm trying to make this right. There is obviously a reason why you're upset, and I want to talk it out sooner rather than later."

"I do not want to talk," Joy enunciated, looking back at her. "There's the door, please shut it after you're out of my room."

Sadly, Victoria turned around and left, but instead of going downstairs to join Elka and Melanie for dinner, she sat outside of Joy's room, waiting for her to come out.

Hours after the sun had gone down, Joy finally did decide to leave her room. She opened her bedroom door and saw her friend sleeping against the wall, still wearing the floral print dress that she had on when she was out shopping, and still clutching the gift box in her hand. Joy felt her heart drop, seeing how much Victoria really did care. She also knew, though, that if she was trying this hard, she could have an ulterior motive. Not that she believed Victoria was trying to be spiteful; it was just that she knew how her plans usually worked. It was all about her… all of the time.

She nudged Victoria slightly and watched her eyes open up.

"You fell asleep, Victoria. You should probably head to bed," Joy said quietly.

"But I want to talk. And I want to give you this," Victoria said, immediate remembering what was going on.

"I don't want either. I just wanted you to get your own room."

"Oh."

The sadness washed over Victoria again as she steadied herself on her feet. She looked away from Joy and headed back to her own room.


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, Joy heard a quick knocking and slowly got out of bed. At this point, she was annoyed about answering the door to find a desperate Victoria, but this time she found Melanie standing there with an unreadable look on her face.

"What's wrong?" Joy asked, looking at her quickly.

"Well, nothing's wrong, but I think you should come downstairs."

"Why?"

"Victoria left you something… on the table."

"Oh… okay," she said, slipping on her robe before following the woman downstairs to the kitchen to see what her friend had left her.

"Did she make these?" Joy asked, looking at the semi-burnt pancakes that were sitting on the table with a note to Joy sitting beside them.

"I assume so, but I don't know. Victoria never cooks… and she's not in her room, or anywhere else for that matter, so I'm going to give her a quick call."

Joy took the note that was folded up tightly with her name printed on the outside, and read through it.

"I know you don't want to talk, but I made breakfast for you. I hope you'll accept my gift; it's sitting on my bed when you're ready. Take as long as you need."

Joy sighed sadly, thinking maybe she had been too tough on her friend. She had been going back and forth in her mind, but she honestly knew that Victoria really did care about her. She looked at the pancakes and then tried a bite, knowing that the woman cooked for no one. It wasn't the best breakfast she'd ever had, but it was from Victoria.

"I can't get ahold of her. Did she say that she was going anywhere today?" Melanie asked, disconnecting the phone call and looking at Joy.

"No…"

"Did she make you those pancakes?"

"Yes, she did."

"Why?"

Joy took a breath. "Because we had a little falling out, and she wants me to talk to her."

"Are you going to?"

"I… yes. I am. I'm really not mad, I just… I guess I just need to talk to her."

"Good. You two need each other, so I hope you'll forgive her for whatever she did."

Joy nodded and sat down to finish her breakfast.

Almost twelve hours later, Victoria still wasn't home, so Joy decided to call her, letting her know that she wanted to talk. But Victoria didn't answer. After a few more phone calls in the following hours, the Brit began to panic. She went to Victoria's room, hoping to find something that would tell her where the woman was, but she saw the box with another note out of the corner of her eye. She moved to touch it, and opened the envelope with her name on it.

"I've temporarily moved out to give you the space you need, but I've left a key and a number so that we can talk when you decide that you're ready. Please open your gift, Joy. It'll look lovely on you. Call me when you want to talk."

Joy took the key inside the envelope out and saw the phone number as well as the room number written on the back with black ink. She then opened the tiny box and pulled out a bracelet. It was the charm bracelet that she had been looking at for quite some time in a small boutique window in town, and Victoria had even given her a charm to go on it. It was a silver little martini glass and it caused Joy to smile.

She called the number immediately after fastening the bracelet on her wrist, but got no answer. It was almost two in the morning now, though, so Joy took the card back to her room along with the note and began to search for the address.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you for the comment (:

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Almost an hour and a half later, Joy made her way into the room where Victoria was. When she got to the door, she unlocked it quickly and went inside. Victoria was sleeping in the room off of the living room and when Joy saw her, she smiled to herself, knowing that she was safe. She decided not to wake her up, and instead, climbed into bed next to her.

"Joy?" Victoria asked, turning over, half asleep.

"I'm here, Victoria. Go back to sleep. We'll talk in the morning," Joy whispered, rubbing her back softly.

The next time Victoria woke up, she turned over and realized that Joy coming to her room the night before had been a dream. She curled up in her bed sadly, and tried not to think about how sad she felt. She turned on the television to take her mind off of it all, but moments later, she heard the door unlock. She looked up and couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"Joy! What are you doing here?" Victoria asked, wiping her stray tears that had fallen while thinking about Joy not being there.

"Damn coffee barista mixed up my order so I had to go back…" Joy complained, setting down the two cups of coffee and then pulling a bag out of her purse. "I brought you coffee and a breakfast sandwich."

"Why?"

"I was hungry and I thought we could eat while we talk," Joy said, handing the other woman her coffee and then climbing into the bed beside the actress with her own coffee and their breakfast.

"So, you did come here last night?"

"Yes… but you were asleep and I didn't want to wake you."

"I thought it was a dream."

"No, I know we need to talk; you're way too important for me to keep ignoring you."

Victoria smiled at Joy. "You're important to me, too, Joy. Did you like your bracelet?"

"Oh, yes. It's lovely," Joy smiled, flashing her bracelet in front of its buyer.

"I knew it would look beautiful on you."

"Well thank you," Joy blushed.

"So… will you tell me what happened between us, because I just want to make this right," Victoria said, pleading through her eyes.

Joy nodded. "I… I'm just hurt, Victoria. It feels like every time you think you have a news story, you are willing to use me to get it. Ever since you got this job, you've been different. I don't want to be used by my friends."

Victoria looked at her carefully. "I wouldn't do that, Joy."

"But you do, do that. You were willing to risk my deportation twice now for your news stories!"

"But I didn't use them! And I wouldn't! You know me better than that!"

"Why do I feel like I don't, then?"

"I don't know, Joy… I have never intentionally hurt you, though. And I never would. I love you too much!"

Joy looked at Victoria, reading her expression, seeing the shocked and nervous expression on her face that the bold woman rarely wore. "Wait… you love me? Like… you're in love… with… me?"

Victoria gulped and tore her eyes from Joy's and looked at her lap for a moment.

"Victoria?" Joy asked, wanting an answer.

"I… yes, Joy… I am in love with you, okay? In more than a "friend" way," she admitted, as tears filled her eyes, and a lump filled her throat. She looked at Joy, and whispering, she added, "I'm so sorry…"

Joy moved to hug her friend, and soothingly stroked her hair. "You don't have to be sorry, Victoria. It just happens sometimes."

Nodding against the woman she loved, Victoria's cries continued before Joy said, "And I love you, too."

Stopping for a minute to look at her friend, the actress asked, "Really?"

"What do you think this whole temper tantrum was about? I didn't realize it at first, but I get so offended when you say you want to use me as your news story because I love you. I know that you would never do that, but to hide my feelings, I got upset with you and decided to use it against you to somehow try and convince myself I didn't love you. That's not fair, I know, but it does hurt me whenever you say that you want me to be your news line, even in jest, because I love you so much."

"I promise I never would," Victoria told her, looking into her eyes.

"I know… I know you wouldn't."

"From now on, I'm not even going to talk about the news in front of you, okay?"

"Oh, Tori… you know I want to hear about your day, so of course you'll have to talk about it. Just… don't make me a part of it."

"I won't. I promise you that I won't," she said, snuggling back into Joy's hug.


	5. Chapter 5

"Do you want to go home?"

"Well, I have this room until eleven this morning."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes… unless you're ready to go home."

Joy shook her head. "Maybe not yet."

"Oh?" Victoria asked innocently.

Joy smiled and moved to kiss her lips, climbing on top of her gently. She began unbuttoning her silk pajamas and revealed that Victoria wasn't wearing anything underneath.

"Mmm…" Victoria moaned as Joy touched her soft breast.

"Wow… you are gorgeous, Tori," Joy whispered, leaning down to make contact between her own lips and her friend's skin.

Victoria writhed beneath her for a moment, but when she got the chance, she traded places with Joy in a flash, pushing her hands up behind her head.

"Where did you learn to do that?" Joy asked breathlessly, surprised as Victoria suddenly ended up above her.

"Johnny Revere, dear," Victoria exhaled sharply and moved her hands under Joy's t-shirt. She exposed her friend's bra and pushed it up over her lady parts. She pushed both articles of clothing up over her friend's head and rested her eyes on her target.

"God… Joy…" Victoria whispered, taking her friend's breasts into her hands.

"That feels so good!"

"You like that?" Victoria raised her brow seductively.

Joy nodded rapidly. "I love it… don't stop…"

"You want more?"

"Please, Tori!"

Victoria let go of Joy's breasts and sank her teeth into Joy's flesh, causing the younger woman to jump. She then realized how wonderful it felt and let Victoria do what she wanted.

The actress then kissed her way down to her belly and to her thighs, where she pulled Joy's skirt off. Joy could tell that Victoria had done this before, but she thought to ask her about it would ruin the moment. Victoria then slid her lips up to her lacy panties and removed them with her mouth. She then lead her tongue back up to Joy's slit and traced the outline, driving the foreigner crazy.

Victoria noticed Joy's breathing get sharper and quicker, so she dipped a finger pad inside of her friend. "Baby, you're awfully wet…"

"Only because you're holding out!" Joy exclaimed, exasperated.

"Can't take a little teasing?"

Joy shook her head. "I want to feel you inside of me."

"You do?"

"Yes, Victoria! Please, fuck me… now!"

"Oh, Joy… your British manners are diminishing in front of me!" Victoria teased, leaning down to lick her clit lightly as Joy began to pant with every flick of the woman's tongue.

"Oh, God… please, Tori? Put your fingers inside of me! Please!"

"Like this?" she asked, barely pushing a single finger slowly inside of Joy.

"Victoria!" Joy screamed, wrapping her legs around the slender woman and forcing her closer.

"Alright, alright… you've been a good girl," she smirked, and gently pushed two more fingers inside, as deeply as she could. "How's that, baby?"

Joy nodded, thanking Victoria for giving her a moment to adjust to the temporary addition to her opening. "Wonderful."

Pumping in and out, Victoria used her thumb to stroke Joy's love button, and leaned her mouth down to nibble on her breasts for a few moments. The sensation soon became too much for Joy to handle, and she had an orgasm that ripped intensely through her body.

"Fuck! Tori!" she yelled, riding out the multiple spasms she felt that overwhelmed her.

Victoria let her finish and then pulled her hand out carefully, before licking her fingers with a wink. "You're beautiful when you come. And you taste so sweet."

Blushing, Joy let her go from her legs, and urged her to come and lay with her for a moment while she caught her breath. "Let me return the favor."

"Rest for now, honey. You've got plenty of time to return the favor," she told Joy with a kiss.

"Speaking of… that favor… you… you've done this before, haven't you?"

"You sound upset."

"No, no. I… I'm not upset. I'm disappointed I wasn't your first woman, but I'm not upset. I guess I thought that since we are best friends, you would tell me something like this."

"Joy, I didn't know how to tell you. Or Melanie. I… I kept it to myself and I never thought it would come out. Not because I'm ashamed, but because I just… I didn't want you or Mel to ever think I was trying to sleep with either of you. Although there was that time when I asked Melanie to help me make a lesbian sex tape… but that's not the point."

Joy nodded. "I understand… I just needed to hear you say that, I suppose," she told her lover, pulling her closer. "I love you, Victoria, and I'm so happy that I can say that freely now. I'm also happy that I have the best teacher in the world to show me how to do this, because I will admit, I've never done this with a woman before."

"Well, I have to admit, I've never not asked someone to give back what I gave them, so you are certainly special… in so many ways. I love you, too, Joy," she said, kissing her cheek.


	6. Chapter 6

Joy and Victoria got back to their house in just enough time for Melanie to come running outside, greeting them frantically.

"Thank God you're okay!" she exclaimed, hugging Victoria. "What happened, Victoria? Where were you?"

"She just needed a little time away from the house, right?" Joy said, looking at her friend turned lover carefully.

"Yeah, I'm okay now, though," she smiled at the shorter woman.

"Did you two make up?"

Victoria's eyes widened as she looked at Joy, who nodded. "Yes, we're the best of friends again."

Melanie grinned. "Good… because I was thinking of planning a spa day of this weekend. Elka is still able to travel before sentencing… it might be fun!"

"That sounds really great, Mel, but I need to go rest before my segment tonight," Victoria said with a gently nod.

"I'll help you with your bags," Joy chimed in as they turned to walk up the stairs while Melanie headed to the kitchen, intent on planning their big day.

"You told her about our fight?" the actress asked harshly but quietly as soon as they were out of earshot.

"Not like you think. I just told her we had a tiff, but I didn't say anything else, I swear."

Victoria nodded. "Okay… I just don't want her thinking I'm a horrible person."

Joy grabbed her shoulder. "You're not a horrible person, Victoria! You are a beautiful, wonderful, adorable woman whom I love and care about so much. The things I said were awful because I know you and I know how truly amazing you are. I shouldn't have said what I did… and I am so sorry," Joy told her as she hugged her tightly.

"No… I'm sorry for treating you like that. I hate that I made you feel like I was using you, because I never would," Victoria whispered.

"Don't ever be sorry for who you are. I love you for being so eager in your career and doing what you have to, to get what you want. I know you'd never use me, honey… maybe at the time I was confused, but now I know exactly why I thought that… and I know none of it was true. I know how much you care about me," Joy soothed, rubbing her back. "C'mon… I'll tuck you in and go help Melanie plan."

"Okay."

Later that night, after Victoria got home, Joy and Melanie both informed her that they would be leaving for the spa early the next morning, and the actress told them both that she had the next evening off so she would be able to be out longer than they anticipated. But, Melanie, the planner that she was, had been looking into going out to dinner afterward anyway, but now Victoria could be included!

"Good night ladies! I've got to get my beauty sleep, especially since we're heading out so early tomorrow!" Melanie told the women, getting up to head upstairs. "Have a wonderful night! And don't go to bed too late; we've got a lot to do tomorrow!"

Joy and Victoria waved her off with smiles and then began to go upstairs themselves.

"Show me your spa outfit before bed?" Joy asked, giving her friend a seductive glance.

"No! It's a surprise," Victoria said with a light smile.

"Oh, c'mon! I haven't seen you all night… and I've missed you," Joy whispered, backing her against the wall for a kiss.

"I've missed you, too," Victoria nodded breathlessly.

"Show me…"

"We can't tonight, honey. I'll show you tomorrow, I promise."

"Please? Just a preview?"

"Joy! C'mon… it'll be even better tomorrow."

"Tori… please?"

With a slightly annoyed sigh, she pulled Joy into her room and shut the door quickly. She grabbed her shirt that she had worn to tape her segment and pulled it up over her head and moments later, pulled it back down.

"Happy?" Victoria asked after flashing her friend.

Joy kissed her again, nearly bruising her lips, and then let her go. "Not the outfit I'd recommend for the spa, but I sure did enjoy it. I guess I will see you in the morning."

With a light laugh, Victoria said, "Goodnight Joy. I love you."

"I love you, too."


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning, everyone was ready to go at eight sharp. They all met in the sitting room and of course, Victoria was the last one to make it down the stairs. She was always one to arrive fashionably late, and living with her friends hadn't broken her of this habit, unfortunately for them, but she didn't seem to mind when they complained. She had her large Louis Vuitton on one arm and a pair of over-grown sunglasses in the opposite hand.

"Sleep well, sleeping beauty?" Melanie asked softly, looking at her friend who almost looked as though she had not slept well the night before. Melanie could always pick up on an attitude, just by the way someone walked or spoke, but with Joy, Victoria, and now even Elka, just the way they made an entrance.

With a slight smile, Victoria touched her shoulder, thanking her for her comment and concern, "I slept okay, I was just trying to readjust to my bed and found myself having a hard time falling asleep."

Joy felt a tinge of jealousy when Melanie called her by the name of a Disney princess and a stronger ping when Victoria touched Melanie's arm. She knew she had nothing to worry about, but she really felt like Victoria was hers now, and she wanted Victoria's hands on her… not on anyone else, even if she was their best friend.

"If we wait around any longer, I'm gonna turn ninety! Let's go!" Elka complained, as soon as she heard Victoria's voice.

"Okay, okay… I'll drive," Melanie offered, with a smile as she went to open the door.

"Shot gun!" Elka called, watching the younger women leave the house. She followed behind and closed the door behind them. They all piled into Melanie's small car that she had recently purchased.

"Could this car be any smaller?" Victoria complained, practically hitting her head on the ceiling of the vehicle.

"It's efficient on gas, Victoria!" Melanie defended, but secretly breathed a sigh of relief, seeing Victoria was back to her old self, since she had yet to really see Victoria act like herself since almost a week before that.

With a roll of her eyes, Victoria got comfortable against the seat and saw Joy get in the car on the other side. She gave the woman a big grin, wanting to hug her and kiss her, but instead she just watched Joy's every move. She saw the slight frown on Joy's face and placed a hand on her leg to get her attention.

"Everything okay?" she asked, very quietly, not wanting to tip anyone off.

"Yeah… just tired," Joy said with a soft smile, and then turned to look out the window.

Victoria dropped it, and as soon as she did, Melanie began backing out of the driveway.

"I'm so excited about our day! It's going to be so much fun! Mud baths… massages… the sauna! I can't believe they even have a tanning booth!"

"Two, I think," Victoria spoke up.

"I'm not tanning! Do you think my fair, porcelain skin can handle it?" Elka exclaimed, touching her arm gently.

With a laugh, Melanie added, "I didn't say you had to tan, Elka, I just said they have a tanning booth."

Shaking her head, the actress in the backseat yawned dramatically. She didn't want to make anything awkward between anyone in the car, so she announced, "I'm so tired… Joy, can I use your lap as a pillow?"

Joy snapped out of her day dream and looked at Victoria. "Hmm? Oh… yeah, sure," she said, letting her legs move flatly together, watching Victoria lay down on them and smile up at her.

"Good… maybe this will help her keep her legs closed!" Elka said from the front seat.

Annoyed, Joy shook her head and then reached down and stroked Victoria's hair. She shouldn't be upset; she knew Victoria loved her and that she would never love Melanie that way… so, why was she letting this bother her so much?

Twenty or so minutes of silence passed by and Melanie looked in the rearview mirror. "You guys okay back there?"

Joy looked at her through the mirror and nodded. "She's out like a light."

"Poor thing… she must have been so tired," Melanie said apathetically.

"Probably from staying up all night with her legs open." Elka commented.

"No… c'mon, Elka. Just because we dress a little… young for our age, doesn't mean we always have to have a man around. Sometimes we just need each other. Like today. Nothing I could do with a man would make me happier than this spa day with my best friends."

"I can think of a few things I'd rather be doing with a man!"

Joy just rolled her eyes and played with Victoria's hair as she watched her breathe. She could not wait to get Victoria alone today. Even though it had only been since last night, things just did not feel right unless she was with the older woman.


	8. Chapter 8

Once Melanie parked the car in the parking lot, the women walked into the spa and checked in for their appointments. Melanie was heading to the sauna while Victoria went to tan and Elka and Joy headed to the massage tables.

"What's wrong with you today, Bones?" Elka asked, looking over at Joy as they were both having the knots kneaded out of their backs.

"Nothing… I'm alright," Joy told her, looking up at Elka to be more convincing, but then putting her head back down.

"Joy… we may not be best friends… or even friends at all, but I can tell when something is going on. You looked upset in the living room and in the car and you're still not any better. Besides, you haven't insulted me once. You're just taking it. That's not like you."

Joy sighed, looking back over at the elderly woman. "I guess I'm having… jealousy issues."

"Jealous? You? Well good. You're not that good looking and you're too skinny!" Elka teased.

"Not of anyone else's appearance, Elka… just… never mind. Let's just get our massages in peace."

"Oh, c'mon, Joy. I'm sorry… I… I thought I could get a rise out of you. Tell me what's going on," the woman urged.

"You know how you feel every time you see that Agnes Bratford character is with your Max? Even though you know Max only has eyes for you… you still get angry and call her names to make you feel better? Well… imagine if Agnes was one of your friends. A close friend at that. It would make you even more upset, wouldn't it?"

"Is that what you and Victoria were fighting about? She's moving in on your man?"

With the first smile she put on all day, Joy shook her head. "No… not at all. I was just trying to give a scenario. I guess I'm just jealous… that's all."

Elka looked at Joy carefully a second later, as if something clicked. "Wait… you don't have a boyfriend. Who are you jealous of?"

"Oh… I don't kiss and tell," Joy said, turning away from the woman to avoid further questioning.

"Since when?"

"You're hilarious, Elka… I cannot contain my laughter."

Elka shrugged to herself as best she could. "If you don't tell me who it is, I can't help you."

"Who said I wanted your help anyway?" the brunette asked, opening a single eye at the older woman.

"Joy, you didn't have to say it. It's obvious to me that you need it."

"No I don't, honestly. I just need to get over myself and realize that this is how it's been forever and things cannot just change at the drop of a hat."

Elka's eyes widened. "Who is this wonderful man, Joy? I think he's turning you into… a compassionate human being? Yes… I think so!"

"Oh, hush. Leave me in peace while I get my massage."

"Alright, but remember what you said… get over yourself." Elka told her dryly before turning her head in the opposite direction, missing Joy rolling her eyes at the comment.


	9. Chapter 9

Joy had a plan, and now, she had the perfect opportunity to put it into action when she saw Melanie walking toward her in the hallway.

"Was your massage appointment cancelled?" Joy asked, looking at the woman carefully.

"No… why?" Melanie asked, meeting her half way down the corridor.

"Someone just came up to me, thinking I was Victoria, and told me my appointment had been cancelled. I've been trying to find her to tell her to go to the sauna."

"Do you want me to call her?"

"Just text her and let her know that the staff wants her in room 437 instead of the room you're headed to. I'd do it myself but I left my phone in the car." Joy shrugged.

"Okay…" Melanie said, taking out her phone to send a quick note to her friend. "Done. If she doesn't get it, I'll just send her down there when she gets to the room."

Joy nodded, hoping it wouldn't get that far. If it did, she was busted. "Thank you Melanie."

"Yep! I'll see you later… and by then, I'll be much more relaxed!" Melanie chirped before walking away, intent on getting her massage.

Joy then went to the room she had told Melanie to have Victoria meet her in. It was all set. Before Joy had worked in the cosmetic department, she had done a few years' worth of work at a spa, and was sure that this would be romantic. She needed some alone time with her lover, and this was the perfect way to do it.

Meanwhile, Victoria had just finished slipping out of her clothes and into a robe when her phone began vibrating. She looked at it, surprised that Melanie would text her since they would be meeting up in a couple of minutes. But when Victoria opened the text, she realized she would not be meeting up with her. She was going somewhere else.

The actress began her journey up to room 437 and nearly got lost along the way. She had to go up two sets of stairs and almost all the way to the opposite side of the building. When she got there, she saw candles set out and already lit, but no sign of an attendant. She disrobed and lay down on the bed, covering her behind with the towel left out for her to use.

As soon as Victoria got comfortable, she heard the door open.

"Hello?" she asked moments later after whoever was there had not said anything to her.

"Hello Victoria."

The woman thought she recognized the voice, but the slightly off-American accent was someone's whom she just couldn't put her finger on. As she went to open her eyes, she felt a padded but soft fabric over her eyes.

"You want a deep tissue massage, correct?"

"Right, my shoulders are very tense."

"Alright, that's what we'll focus on then."

Victoria shuddered as soon as she felt the woman place oil on her back. She felt the woman's hands next and let out an audible moan. The actress was never one to hold back, but she felt a little guilty because the only one who should be making her feel hot and bothered was Joy. Speaking of Joy, Victoria wondered what she was up to, but little did she know she was actually the masseuse.

"How's that?"

"Good… really good."

"Wonderful."

Joy began to move her hands down Victoria's back and up and down her legs. She subtly slipped a hand between her thighs and began massaging her toned muscles.

Victoria held her moan in and breathed out quickly. Joy could hear Victoria getting worked up so she slid her hand carefully over the crease of her womanhood, causing the older woman to gasp and tense up.

"Oh! I'm sorry," Joy said, moving her hands back down to Victoria's calves.

"It's… alright. I'm just a little on edge."

"Sometimes I've found it actually helps people if they talk to me about what's going on with them. It's very therapeutic."

"I'm just… I just told the person I've been in love with for the last twenty years how I feel, and even though this person feels the same way for me, I don't know if we're ready to take our love to the next level. Well, I certainly am, but I'm afraid J-… this person is just not quite there yet. I don't want to make this person do anything that they aren't ready for."

"Have you talked to… this person about it at all?"

"No… and usually I'm not one to keep this kind of thing to myself, but I really care about… this person and the last thing I want to do is push them into this." Victoria paused as the woman reached her back. "I don't know… I think that this person is just really nervous."

"Well, maybe you should talk to this person about this. Maybe if you tell them how you feel, they might prove you wrong and help you relieve some of this…" Joy moved her hands to the sides of Victoria's breasts, "tension."

"Mm… uhm, I thought you said you would focus on my shoulders."

"Of course I will," Joy said, as she really gave Victoria exactly what she asked for. Twenty minutes later, Victoria turned over, keeping her towel over her most intimate areas, only exposing her neckline.

"My back feels wonderful…" she said, getting comfortable.

"I'm glad… now… about that person you were telling me about… I'm only going to say this once, and then I'll leave you in peace while we finish your massage," Joy said, leaning in to whisper to the actress, "I think you should tell her."

Victoria removed her eye mask immediately, recognizing the British accent and looked at Joy, completely shocked. She knew she recognized the voice, but it had been a long time since Joy used her fake American accent around Victoria. "Joy! What are you doing here?"

"Giving you a massage," Joy teased, touching the woman's collarbone gently as the older woman leaned up onto her elbows.

"The whole time?"

"Yes, and let me tell you, Tori, I feel exactly how you do. Maybe I was a little nervous because you're so experienced, but I want to make you feel the same way I felt yesterday. I want to be with you… intimately. Here. Now…" she said, moving her tongue down to lick Victoria's chest, slowly moving her mouth up to her lips, nearly smothering her in kisses.

"Wait, Joy… are you sure?"

"Yes. I'm absolutely sure," Joy told Victoria before proceeding to move her mouth down to the woman's breasts where she licked and suckled and bit for a couple of moments before she realized Victoria was ready for more.

Even though Joy wasn't experienced with women at all, Victoria had an incredible orgasm, and afterward, she pulled Joy up on the table next to her. Joy stroked Victoria's hair, and once they had both rested for a little while, they got up and had to get ready to leave. Words didn't need to be spoken between them because they were so in sync with each other. Neither Joy nor Victoria had ever felt like this before, and it was wonderful.


	10. Chapter 10

The women all met up at the end of the day and when they left the building, they headed to Melanie's car. Victoria and Joy were beaming and casually bumping into each other, but it went unnoticed by Elka and Melanie.

"Wow, the spa really worked wonders for you two!" Melanie exclaimed, climbing into the driver's seat of her car.

"Yes, it certainly did," Victoria told her friend, subtly stroking Joy's thigh.

"I mean, I feel rejuvenated, but you both just look so…"

"Hot!" Elka cut in, getting into the car. "Especially Joy! She looked miserable last time I saw her."

"Nice…" Victoria shook her head at the older woman making her usual comments, but also wondering what had Joy so upset earlier that day.

"It was a compliment!" Elka defended.

"Well, thank you… I think," Joy said, secretly taking Victoria's hand.

"So, what do you say we grab dinner and head home?" Melanie suggested, looking in the rearview mirror at her friends as she drove her car out of the parking lot.

"Wait! I forgot my purse!" Elka said quickly, just as Melanie had gotten onto the main road.

"Elka!" the woman whined. She then sighed. "Alright… let's go back and get it."

Once the car was turned around and parked, Elka started to head inside. Slowly.

"I might as well go with her… I don't even know if she knows where she left it," Melanie said, getting out of the car and running to catch up with the white haired beauty, leaving the actress and the eyebrow queen alone in the backseat.

"So, if Elka thought you were so miserable, why didn't I see it?" Victoria asked, looking at Joy softly.

"I… I didn't want anyone to know. Elka just… she's… she just knows. I don't know how to explain it. She's like a mother to me, and she knew before I even opened my mouth. We were getting our massages together and she wouldn't leave it alone."

"Why were you so upset?"

"I was just jealous… of Melanie."

"Melanie? Why?" Victoria asked, slightly concerned.

"It's stupid…"

"Tell me."

Joy shrugged. "Really, it's nothing."

"Joy, I want to be able to listen to all of your problems. Let's talk about it now before it becomes an issue for us."

"Okay… I just… the way Melanie spoke to you this morning, and how you touched her… it just made me jealous. Not because I think you want to be with Melanie or because I think you're even attracted to her, but I want to be the one who gets to greet you in the morning. I want to be the first one to touch you… to kiss you. I want to wake up beside you and I can't," Joy explained, feeling worse with every word she spoke. She had tears in her eyes now that were threatening to fall.

"Oh, honey… you know Melanie is just my friend. You… you are so much more than a friend," Victoria told Joy, taking her into her arms. "I love you, Joy. And for as much as I want the same thing, I know that we can't have it right now. We have to be careful around Elka, and even more so around Melanie. Just for now… until we both agree on the timing of telling them."

Joy nodded, wiping her tears. "I just… I miss you when you're not around. As stupid and pathetic as that sounds, it's true."

Victoria wiped a single tear from Joy's eye. "You know, I am an Emmy winning actress… I suppose I could conjure up some excuse as to why I'll be found walking out of your bedroom tomorrow morning if that's what it takes."

"Really? You'd be okay with that?"

"Joy, I told you. I want exactly what you want. You… you know how I feel about you," she said, blushing slightly.

Joy nodded at her. "Then it's a date?"

"It sure is."


	11. Chapter 11

After everyone was settled into bed that night, including Victoria, who was now in Joy's bed instead of her own, Joy found herself dealing with the heavy weight on her mind. She held Victoria's waist tightly, and when she finally fell asleep, it was almost time for Melanie to get up. Victoria had to be awake, too, but her segment started at noon that day, giving her an extra few hours to stay in bed.

Victoria's alarm clock went off at around nine o'clock that morning, and when she awoke, Joy did, too.

"Good morning," Victoria said sweetly, turning over to her side to look at the woman sleeping in the same bed as she was in.

"Good morning," Joy yawned.

"How'd you sleep?"

"I didn't really sleep… I couldn't fall asleep," the brunette admitted.

"Now, I know it must be exciting having a celebrity in your bed, Joy, but don't lose sleep over it," the actress teased.

Shaking her head with a grin, Joy moved in to kiss her sweetheart's lips to quiet her.

"Hmm…" Victoria sighed happily after breaking the kiss. "Really, though, honey… is something on your mind?"

"I know you have to get ready for work… but maybe we can talk later?"

"Of course we can. Why don't we take a walk or have drinks on the porch when I get home," Victoria offered.

"Yeah… that sounds good to me," Joy smiled as she watched Victoria start to get up.

"I'm going to take a shower and get ready. I'll see you before I leave, even if you don't see me," she smiled, giving her one more kiss before leaving the room.

When Victoria was ready to leave, she checked on Joy, who was now sleeping. So, Victoria just smiled to herself, watching the woman sleep for a moment, and then left for work.

Unfortunately for Victoria, though, she didn't realize that when she went in that day, she'd be taping a week in advance. She had forgotten that the producer had the following week off, and the only live segments would be the news and the weather reports. She had also left her phone in Melanie's car that morning when the author had dropped her off.

When she was finally done late that night, she got a ride home with a co-worker and went into the house, thinking no one was home since Melanie's car was missing from the driveway.

"Joy! Mel!" Victoria called, turning on the living room lights. She went upstairs and found Melanie's room empty, but there was a dim light coming from under Joy's door and a soft noise resonating from the same source.

"Joy," she tapped on the door and went inside quietly. She saw Joy on her bed with her head in her hands and Victoria quickly realized Joy was crying, so she went to comfort her.

"Hey… it's okay, honey…" Victoria said gently, thinking that it was her fault Joy was upset.

"Why-why didn't you call me back? Why didn't you come home?" Joy cried, burying herself in Victoria's chest as the older woman rubbed her back, feeling extremely guilty.

"I'm so sorry Joy… my phone is in Melanie's car. I accidently left it there this morning. I didn't realize I was taping for this whole week… that's why I was there so late," the actress explained.

"But I needed you," Joy cried.

"Why? Joy… is something wrong? Is Melanie okay?" she gulped before her eyes widened, scared of what she might say. "Is Elka okay?"

"Elka and Melanie are fine… but I'm not…"

"Honey, please tell me what is wrong. Please?"

"I can't have a baby!" Joy nearly shouted angrily between tears.

Victoria just looked at her, stunned by her words. "What?"

"I went to the doctor today and they told me even though my eggs are very fertile, I can't carry a child. After I gave birth to Owen, my uterus didn't heal the right way, so even if I did get pregnant, I wouldn't be able to carry the baby in my womb for any longer than a few weeks."

"Joy… I, I didn't realize that you wanted to get pregnant, but I'm so sorry that you can't have a child," Victoria hugged her tightly, trying to take in what she said.

"I do want a baby, Tori. I really do," Joy cried as Victoria held her, wondering where the hell all of this was coming from. Once Joy was asleep for the third time that day, she helped her lay down and then the older woman went to get changed.

She couldn't believe Joy wanted to be a mother. She had heard Joy mention it once, but she thought it was just a one-time fluke that she got over. Apparently not, though. Victoria shook her head before lying down in her own bed, wondering what she was going to do next… and what Joy was going to do, too.


	12. Chapter 12

The next morning when Joy got up, she realized Victoria hadn't slept in her bed, and she felt her heart ache badly. She immediately started crying, but eventually got herself ready to take a shower. She noticed Victoria's bedroom door was shut and wondered if Victoria was upset with her.

Meanwhile, Victoria had awoken a few hours prior to that, but she left her door closed when she went downstairs so that the air conditioner would keep her room cool. The middle of summer in Cleveland was hotter than she ever expected.

"Hey, Mel, do you think I'm a good mom?" Victoria asked, taking a sip of her coffee, setting down her paper on the coffee table.

A little started by the question, Melanie turned around from her laptop to look at Victoria. "Seriously? Victoria… you don't even remember that you have three kids half the time."

"But I love them, right?"

"Honey… how long has it been since you've seen them?"

"Are you trying to say that I'm a bad mother?" Victoria's voice nearly went up an octave as she looked to Melanie, trying to read her facial expression.

"No… I'm just pointing out that you're not exactly… fond of your kids," Melanie said lightly, not wanting to offend her.

"They want too much!"

Melanie just gave Victoria a look, letting her know that she had proved her point, before she proceeded to turn back around in her chair, hoping to get some work done.

"Now wait! Do you think if I had… done something different… that I'd love them more?" Victoria asked softly.

"I… I don't know, Victoria. I think it depends. Maybe if you had been with someone that you really loved and you two had your children together, it would be different. When you became a mother, you were in a new marriage every few years, and your kids spent their time with nannies and in boarding schools," Melanie reminded her friend.

"So, maybe if I had fallen in love and then had a baby, it would have been different?" the actress wondered out loud.

"Maybe," the brunette said with a soft smile. "Why all this talk of parenting anyway?"

Shrugging, Victoria said, "Just… going through something I guess."

"You… do you want to have another baby?"

"I… no! I guess I have just been thinking about how different my life could have been if I had tried to be a better mother to my kids," she explained.

"Well, you can't change the past, but you can decide what to change to make your future better. Call your kids. Tell them how much you love them, Victoria. I can tell this is really affecting you, and maybe it'll help you feel better," Melanie offered, offering her a sympathetic smile.

"You're right… it probably would make me feel better. I do love them," she swore. "It's just hard for me."

Melanie gave her a sympathetic smile, and went to sit next to her on the couch. "I know it is, Victoria. Maybe your kids don't fully understand that, but I do… and Joy does, too. We know you love your kids, but we also know how you grew up. I think Joy may have been the same way if she had raised Owen… I mean, if she had to do it on her own."

"And you know damn well that guy wouldn't have stuck around. He didn't even want her to have her baby… yet he made it so hard for her to even give Owen up for adoption…" Victoria shook her head in anger over the situation.

"But, Joy stayed strong. And even though I'm sure she would have been a great mom, I think it would have been so hard for her… it was hard for me, and I was married. Happily married," Melanie shrugged.

Victoria patted the top of her hand, sensing that Melanie was still not completely over the divorce yet. "You'll find someone else…"

Melanie nodded with a soft smile. "I know… so will you."

Victoria just smiled to herself, and at the same time as Melanie did, turned around when they heard a crack coming from the stairs.

"Good morning, Joy," Melanie offered, giving her a smile.

Joy gave her a soft smile. "Morning…" she said, avoiding eye contact with Victoria.

"No… wait, Joy… can we talk please? Outside?" Victoria pleaded, getting up, as soon as she saw Joy head toward the front door.

"I'm really, really late," Joy insisted, but Victoria had already caught up with her.

Carefully, she looked over at Melanie, and then walked outside onto the porch. She needed to clear this issue up with Joy, and she needed to do it now.


	13. Chapter 13

"I really have to go, Victoria," Joy said coldly, not bothering to even look the woman in the eye.

"Where? You aren't working, you had a doctor's appointment yesterday… where could you possibly have to go?" the actress asked, looking at Joy directly, not wanting to play games.

"I just have to go. So, please… leave me alone," the younger woman said, turning to leave.

Victoria grabbed her hand, stopping her from going anywhere. "No. You always walk away from your problem instead of just facing it head on. That's why your mother still treats you the way she does, and that is why we fight. I want you to tell me right now what is bothering you, and I'm going to tell you what's bothering me after that."

"Nothing's bothering me besides the fact that I can't have a child," Joy said angrily.

"No, that's not it. You're mad at me."

"No, I'm not!"

"Yes, you are! Tell me what I did and how I can fix it!"

"You knew how upset I was and you didn't even stay with me last night!" Joy said, breaking down into tears, sitting down on the swing as she felt her legs nearly give out. She had been so emotional since she found out that she couldn't have a baby… every word made her world shake.

Victoria bit her lip. She should have known Joy would be upset about that. She moved to hold her, though, and soothed, "I'm sorry, honey. I… I wanted to stay with you… but, Joy, you have to understand how confused I was. I didn't realize that you even wanted a baby. Now that we're… involved, I just… I thought you'd tell me something like that before hand."

"I didn't know how," Joy continued to cry, burying herself in Victoria's shoulder.

Softly, Victoria rubbed her back and then said, "I love you, Joy. I want you to know that. But, I also want you to know that just because I'm an amazing actress, doesn't mean you can just drop something like that on me… because I don't know how to take it sometimes. And if that sounds selfish, then so-be-it."

Joy looked up for a moment, her crying paused, and she nodded. "It doesn't. It sounds real. And I love you, too," she said shakily. "I'm sorry."

Cupping her face with her hands, Victoria shook her head. "You don't have to be sorry. We'll… we'll figure something out, okay?"

"Okay."

The actress kissed her lover's forehead and let her finish crying. When she did, they both stood up and held each other for what felt like ever.

"I… I better get going. I really do have to go out today."

"Where are you going?"

"Therapy. I scheduled an emergency session after yesterday. I just think I really need to sit down and talk everything out with someone who doesn't know me as well as you or Melanie and can give me advice not based on personal feelings, but on professionalism."

Victoria nodded. "Okay. Text me when you're finished?"

"Sure. I will see you in a little while," Joy said, giving Victoria another hug and secretly kissing her cheek. She wasn't sure if Elka and/or Melanie was inside watching through the window, so she didn't want to do anything to give away their relationship.

Victoria watched Joy leave and shook her head. Maybe she should talk to someone, too. Talking to Melanie had helped, but she didn't fully understand her situation. Victoria decided that she needed someone who did.


	14. Chapter 14

Later that day, both Victoria and Joy had returned home, feeling much better about the situation that they were dealing with. They were both ready to sit down and talk to one another, but they knew that they would have to get away from the house in order to do so.

"Joy… take a walk with me?" Victoria asked, as Joy came in from the kitchen to sit down with her friends.

"Uh… yeah. Sure. Let me grab a coat."

Victoria stood up and before she could move, Elka asked, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing… Joy and I just need to talk."

"Why can't you do it here?" the eldest woman asked almost innocently.

"Because you're here," Victoria replied dryly.

Melanie giggled. "It's probably for the best if you leave the house. I'll keep Elka occupied."

"Why can't I know what's going on?!"

Victoria shook her head. "Nothing's going on. I just… Joy was upset yesterday and I'm trying to help her out. I'm not really even sure of the situation," she explained.

"I know nothing!" Melanie chimed in.

Elka gave her a look that she often saved Joy. "Well, no wonder. You can't keep a secret!"

"I can, too! I never told anyone that I kissed Victoria's third husband after a few too many glasses of wine last night," she blurted out, immediately covering her mouth afterward.

"Excuse me?" Victoria asked, looking at her friend with raised brows.

"Ooh… I'm sorry! I… I didn't mean for you to find out, especially like this…" she grimaced.

Waving her off, the actress let it go. "He was gay anyway. I'm sure he kissed more than you when he was trying to decide on his sexuality," she shrugged.

Elka just shook her head. "Okay, okay! I get it! Melanie doesn't know."

"Know what?" Joy asked, walking down the stairs.

"Where we're going. It's a surprise," Victoria threw in, before opening the door for her lover. "We'll see you two later."

"Have fun!" Melanie called after them, watching them leave.

"What the hell did I miss in there?" Joy asked, as they left the porch together, heading into the woods.

"Nothing besides Elka being nosey… and apparently Melanie kissed Gary after a few too many back in the day," the older woman shrugged.

"You're not mad?"

"Did she kiss you?"

Joy paused, looking at Victoria curiously. "No…"

"Okay, then what's the problem?"

Smiling, Joy leaned her head on Victoria's shoulder for a moment, letting the woman know that her comment pleased her.

"How, eh… how was therapy?" Victoria asked awkwardly, after moments of silence passed over them. They reached an abandoned bike path, and began heading down the thin road. The ladies had stumbled upon this path before, but they hadn't told anyone else of their findings in case some nosey neighbors needed a new place to work-out.

"It… it was refreshing. I… I think it went really well."

"So, what are you going to do? What do you want to do?"

"About therapy?"

"About the baby. Or… the hypothetical baby."

Joy shook her head. "Unless I adopt, or find a surrogate, I'm not going to have one. I don't really have the money for a surrogate, and I don't think anyone is going to let me adopt right now, especially after being in jail for selling drugs."

"Oh," Victoria nodded solemnly. "You… you'd want to have a surrogate?"

"Well, the doctor said my eggs are very viable, it's just that I can't carry a child in my womb," Joy told her, knowing Victoria may not have caught that part of the conversation when she was sobbing to her. "The doctor had some of my eggs tested a few months ago when I first considered having another baby…"

"I remember you telling me that, but I'm just surprised you'd want someone else carrying your child for you. Even if they are your eggs."

"For as much as I loved being pregnant, Tori, it didn't really agree with me. Maybe it was all of the morning sickness or maybe it was because I knew I wasn't keeping my child, but either way, it wouldn't be hard for me to give up that part, especially because I have to," she said. She knew it would be hard seeing someone else carrying her baby, but she knew that in the end, she would be so happy to have an infant of her own in her arms.

Victoria looked away, taking what Joy said in, and saw the start of the cement wall only a few yards away and began to head toward it.

"Victoria!" Joy called after her, beginning to chase her, but then seeing that she was just trying to sit down. "Are you okay?" she asked, making it to the wall where Victoria was now sitting.

"I… I just needed to sit."

"What's wrong? Something's wrong."

"No, no. Nothing's wrong. Just… I thought maybe we could sit."

"Victoria…"

"I need to talk to you about something, Joy."

Joy gulped, looking at Victoria carefully. "Okay."

"I went to therapy today, too," Victoria confessed, running her hand through her hair nervously. "I… I was confused and upset and… I just felt like I could use someone to talk to, too. So, I went to therapy and it really opened my eyes," she told Joy, taking her hand gently.

"Do you want to talk about it?" the brunette asked.

Nodding, the actress said, "I was speaking to Melanie earlier about how much I was missing my kids and about how different it might have been had I actually been with someone I really loved when I decided to adopt my kids. I… I called them on my way to therapy, and even though none of them answered, I still called."

"That's great, darling. That's really great."

"But you haven't even heard the biggest part yet."

"Which is?"

"Joy, after talking to Melanie, and the therapist, and especially after talking to you, I decided that I'd really like to be your… your surrogate. Well, no. I want to be more than that. I want to… I want to have a baby with you. I mean, if that's what you want. I set up an appointment with my gynecologist, and if you want to… we can set up a time where they can take your eggs and just put them inside of me."

Joy just stared at Victoria for a moment. "I'm sorry… repeat that for me? I… I think I just made up my own dialogue in my head. What did you say?"

"No, you heard me right. I want to have a baby with you, Joy. If that's what you want, of course," she whispered.

"God, Victoria… yes, yes that's absolutely what I want! But… are you sure? You… you've already had three children on your own, but that was when you were younger. What if there are complications?"

"That's why I'm going to the doctor first, but Joy, if everything works out there, that's what I want, too. Seeing you yesterday, and realizing how unhappy I've been without you… I want this for us, Joy. It might seem fast, but I've loved you for a long time, and you've wanted a baby for a while… I just think-"

Joy interrupted her and leaned her back so she was lying on the wall. She climbed on top of her and began kissing her harshly. She went to unbutton her shirt, but decided it was taking too long, so she ripped the buttons off.

"Joy!" Victoria exclaimed.

"We'll get you a new one before we go to your doctor's appointment," Joy promised, now touching Victoria's breasts. Luckily for the younger woman, her lover hadn't worn a bra, which was almost too convenient. She tongued around her erect nipple before her hands were working on taking her pants off.

When Joy kissed down Victoria's belly, she decided to use one hand to hold Victoria's hands over her head while the other teased her feminine gem. Her mouth went to work a little lower, and the actress began to moan.

"Fuck… Joy," she writhed, wanting more from Joy.

Joy finally gave her what she wanted, pushing a few fingers inside of her, and letting her tongue tease her swollen bud. Soon, she orgasmed, and was panting as she lay peacefully on the cement wall.

"You're amazing," she breathed.

"So are you," Joy marveled, staring at her gently until the two decided they should return to their house.


	15. Chapter 15

In the following weeks, after Victoria got the "okay" to carry a baby, she and Joy prepared with the hormone injections and picking out the sperm donor. Finally, they went to have the younger woman's eggs placed in Victoria's womb. They were both very excited, although, there was a tinge of jealousy on Joy's end that she didn't even notice she had until after the procedure was finished.

They went home that night, and slept in different rooms, and for a week, Joy insisted they continue sleeping separately.

After two weeks, Victoria took notice.

"Joy, can we talk for a second?" Victoria asked, walking into the kitchen where her friends were seated around the table talking over coffee. She had a fake smile plastered across her face, not wanting to tip anyone off, especially Joy. She didn't want her partner to avoid her anymore.

"What's up?" Melanie asked, looking at the actress, curiously. She was not trying to be nosey, but she wanted to make sure that everything was okay. Honestly, she could sense the tension between the women.

Pushing her smile, Victoria told her, "Waxing emergency. I have a date tonight!"

"With?" Joy questioned, finally looking up at the woman standing beside her. If she wasn't green with envy before that announcement, she sure was now.

Giving Joy a look, Melanie said, "Obviously with a guy who's getting lucky tonight!" When Joy glanced back at her, she almost felt Joy's anger.

"Does he have a name?" Elka pried, not wanting to be left out of the conversation. She may have been old, but that didn't make her dead!

"Ah… Reggie. Joy?" Victoria called again, exiting the room.

"Reggie?" Joy asked, as soon as they were out of earshot. They began heading up the living room stair case and Victoria turned around.

"You know, like Rejoyla… only using the name 'Reggie' won't give us away," Victoria nodded her head, wondering why it wasn't obvious to Joy.

"So, that's not what you wanted to talk to me about?" Joy sighed sadly. She wanted to turn away and ignore Victoria, but she knew that she couldn't hide now.

"What? No! Well, maybe. I would like to go out with you tonight… we go in for tests in a couple of hours," she reminded her lover.

Nodding, Joy replied, "Yes, I know. I'm just not really up for going out tonight, sorry," she finished, walking past her.

"Joy! We haven't even been alone in the same room together ever since the last appointment. I… I'm starting to feel like you don't want to do this anymore."

"Of course I want to do this, Victoria. That's my child!"

"And mine! I'm carrying this baby for us!"

Pursing her lips, Joy nodded. "Fine. You're carrying the baby because I can't, but this baby has no biological connection to you."

Shaking her head, she looked at Joy with an incredulous smile before gritting her teeth together angrily. She didn't say anything back, she just walked back down the stairs and slammed the door on her way out.

Joy heard the noise and closed her eyes, knowing she had gone too far. She hadn't meant to get angry with Victoria, but she was angry with herself. She absolutely wanted a child, especially with Victoria, but she wanted to be pregnant.

She hadn't realized it until that moment, but she desperately wanted to be pregnant. Even though she knew her pregnancy was rough, she knew she'd be missing out on the feeling of her stomach growing swollen with her child inside of her, she'd never feel her stomach move because of her son or daughter's body pressing against the inside of her womb, and she'd never get to show off her baby bump to the world. She hated that the option of having those experiences was taken away from her.

Joy then headed outside where she found Victoria sitting on the swing. She was staring at her lap, chewing on a small piece of her lip, and her hands were resting on her thighs.

"I'm sorry. I know what I said was harsh, and I didn't mean it like that."

Victoria didn't look up. "What did you mean then?"

Sitting down, Joy told her, "I meant that I am upset because I feel like the only chance that I had to be pregnant was wasted. I wasn't allowed to bond with Owen, or raise him… I didn't even see him before I gave him up. Now, I want to have a baby and I can't even carry my own child. I have to depend on someone else to do that for me. It just… it makes me so upset. I feel so insignificant," she teared up, nearly losing her voice to her tears.

Victoria looked over at her and hugged her tightly. She'd been dealing with the hormones and Joy's confession saddened her deeply. "You're not insignificant to me," she told her, stroking her hair. They were both crying now. "You're perfect to me, Joy… and I just want to help you. Once this pregnancy is over, you're going to have your baby and you're going to be the best mother in the world."

Joy looked at her for a moment. "Our baby," she told her with a nod, her eyes glistening with moisture.

"Our baby," Victoria repeated in a hushed whisper, kissing Joy's hair, still holding her in her arms.


	16. Chapter 16

After their doctor's appointment later that day, Joy and Victoria went home to find that they had the house to themselves. They were happy to have the time together, but they wanted it to pass as quickly as possible. The two women waited there for Joy's phone to ring, and when it finally did, they listened together to hear the results of Victoria's blood test. They looked at each other and shared a long hug.

"I… I just thought that it would work," Victoria said sadly, her head resting on the arm of the couch, minutes after Joy had hung up the phone.

"I did, too, honey, but the doctor said it only works about thirty to forty percent of the time. We… we can try again if that's what you want to do," Joy reminded her, rubbing her back a little. She felt bad for Victoria, but she felt sad for herself, too.

Nodding, Victoria said, "I do. But… but maybe we should agree on something. If it doesn't work this time, then it's not meant to be."

Joy swallowed. That was harsh. She didn't know what to feel, but she knew that it was ultimately Victoria's choice because she was carrying the baby. "I… okay. I think that's fair. I do want to have a child, Victoria, but you're right. If this doesn't work, maybe it's not meant to be. Maybe I'm just meant to love you and live happily with you and Melanie and Elka, without a little one running around."

Pursing her lips, the actress looked over at Joy, seeing the desperation in her eyes. She wanted a child, and Victoria wanted to be the one to give her that child. "Let's make another appointment, then. We'll just focus on that for now, and let's just hope that it works. I think believing that it won't work will only make it harder if it doesn't."

Joy gave her lover a smile. "You're right… let's stay positive," she nodded.

The actress then asked, "Maybe we should still go out tonight. Even though we didn't get the results we were hoping for, we should still try to have a good time. I can have a glass of champagne, or vodka…" she half teased. She needed a drink after all of this.

"Yes. We'll go somewhere nice and then stop at Stormie's on the way home for drinks."

"That sounds perfect."

Although they were both thinking about their night, they both just sat on the couch without moving. They were both still a little shaken up about not being pregnant, but even more than that, how much they both hoped Victoria was pregnant. Neither of the women really realized how much they wanted a child until they were told that they weren't having one. Of course, Joy had wanted a baby before, and was devastated when she found out she couldn't carry a child, but this made everything feel so real.

Looking at each other, Joy crawled over to where Victoria was and lied down next to her on the couch. They both knew what the other was feeling, so they held each other for a while, not caring about anything but each other and having a baby together.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Joy kissed Victoria's cheek and Victoria rubbed Joy's outer thigh lovingly, and minutes later, they both decided to get up and get ready to go out.

"Any idea where Melanie went?" Victoria asked, putting a dress on that she had just bought days before.

"No… did you call her?" Joy called from her room, slipping on a little skirt.

"I texted her when we were at the hospital, but I didn't get a response. It's just not like her."

"I'm sure she's okay… maybe she's out with Elka."

Nodding to herself, Victoria checked her hair in the mirror, giving it a little volume with her fingers.

"I'll call her," Joy said, walking into Victoria's room.

"You look gorgeous," Victoria admired, looking at her cute emerald green halter top that complimented her short black skirt very nicely. She pulled her ringlets partially back and wore flats in order to remain the same height as her date.

"So do you," Joy complimented. The actress was wearing a simple sky blue strapless dress that came down almost reaching half way to her knees. She had silver gladiators on her feet, and the color matched her diamond necklace that she had been waiting to wear.

"Hey, you're wearing the bracelet I got you."

"I don't usually take it off…"

"You had it off for the past two weeks."

"I know… and I was stupid."

Victoria gave her a soft smile. "It looks nice."

"Thank you…"

Just as the two were about to kiss, they heard a car pull into the driveway. They headed downstairs and met a very disheveled Melanie, trying to be sly and sneak in through the kitchen.

"Oh! Hi!" Melanie nearly giggled.

"Where have you been?" Joy asked, looking at Melanie curiously.

"Just… out."

"With?" Victoria quizzed.

Showing her teeth, Melanie gave them an awkward glance. "Hank?"

"Really? Married Hank?" the actress questioned.

"He's not married… anymore. He and his wife got divorced a few months ago, and… and he said it was because he was in love with me!"

Rolling her eyes, Joy said, "Mel, he didn't even try to talk to you before now!"

"Yes he did! Almost every day. I… I just ignored him."

"So, you really like him?" Victoria glanced at her friend.

"I really do," Melanie admitted.

Joy looked at her love, before looking at her friend. "Then we're happy for you… honestly."

"You too?" Melanie looked at her older friend.

"Me too," Victoria nodded.

"Aww… thank you guys," she said, pulling them both close to her for a hug. "Where are you two off to?"

"We have a date."

"Oh! Both of you?" Melanie asked, getting a nod from each of the women. "That's great! Well, have fun. I… I won't wait up."

Joy and Victoria just smiled and watched Melanie float up the stairs.

"She seems really happy…" Joy observed.

"Just like us," Victoria said, kissing Joy gently before they left the house.


	17. Chapter 17

A few weeks passed by before Victoria and Joy could get another appointment. Since they had harvested plenty of Joy's eggs, it was all up to Victoria's body now. Joy sat next to her, holding her hand the entire time that she was having the eggs implanted.

"I'm going to schedule an appointment for two weeks from now… and we'll see if this time worked," Dr. Martin informed both women well after the procedure had concluded.

"I… Victoria and I talked and we've decided that if it doesn't work out this time, we're not going to try again. We just don't want to have to go through this anymore," Joy told the doctor, almost sadly. She so desperately wanted a child, but she also wanted what was best for Victoria, and that meant that she wouldn't have to go through this again.

"Well, let's hope it works this time, then," the doctor nodded at them with a reassuring smile.

Victoria nodded. "We're really hoping it does," she confirmed. "Thank you for everything, Dr. Martin. We'll schedule an appointment with the receptionist."

"Great. I'll see you two in a few weeks then," she told them before letting them leave. Once they had made their next appointment, the women headed to the car.

"Wanna get some lunch?" Joy offered.

Victoria shook her head. "If you don't mind, I'd really just like to go home and lay down. I have an early segment to film tomorrow and I don't feel very good right now."

"Should we go back inside?"

"No, no… I think I'm just tired and… maybe a little scared."

"Of?"

"Having a baby… or maybe not having a baby."

Joy nodded. She had been feeling the exact same way. "I know what you mean."

"It's just so hard to picture a year from now, you and I having a tiny infant to take care of for the rest of its life. But…" Victoria trailed off, getting lost in her thoughts.

"It's even harder to imagine not having a baby," the younger woman finished for her.

"Exactly."

"So, what happens if this doesn't work out."

"You can't say that, because it has to work out for us," the actress shrugged lightly, not wanting to put too much thought into the question. If she did, then she knew that she would be so upset if it didn't go the way she wanted it to.

"You're right. It has to work out for us. And it will."

Victoria kissed Joy's cheek before she pulled the car out of the parking lot. They went home where Victoria laid down upstairs, and after seeing Melanie was out with Hank again and Elka was elsewhere with Max, Joy went to lay down with her.

"Hey… everyone's gone," Joy told Victoria gently, shutting the bedroom door behind her after walking into her lover's room.

"Good. C'mere," Victoria told her, without even changing position on her bed. She felt Joy slip into bed beside her and then felt her soft hands on her back.

"How are you feeling?"

"Awful."

"Close your eyes. I'll rub your back for a bit. Maybe you'll fall asleep."

"Okay," Victoria told her, doing as she was told. Joy watched her breathing steady and once she heard the soft sigh escape Victoria's lips, she knew the actress was asleep.

She carefully got up and went down to make some dinner, but after visiting with Melanie for a little while, she went upstairs to go to bed. She made sure that she closed her bedroom door and left her cell phone in her room, but after she showered, she went to Victoria's room to lay close to the woman who was still fast asleep.


	18. Chapter 18

The next morning, Joy woke up to head to her meeting while Victoria was getting ready to film a segment for "Oh, Hi, Ohio!" Joy was working on opening her own salon in town, even though she knew that she wouldn't make as much money as she did in California. She knew that it was different here, but she was not only going to work on waxing, she was going to work on hair and set up a tanning salon. She hoped that with the meeting, she could establish a budget after talking to some of the donors that she had already associated her upcoming business with.

Joy watched Victoria slip her dress on and pouted her lips sympathetically. She didn't want Victoria to feel sick anymore, it made her feel bad for agreeing to go through with the procedure.

"Are you sure you're feeling well enough to work today?"

Nodding in the mirror, Victoria said, "I think I'll be okay. I just want to get through today and come back and lay down." She had been having a rough time, as she had never been a very good patient, but she wanted to show Joy that she was okay. She wanted to do this… and feeling ill was just part of the experience.

"Alright, but if you don't feel better by dinner time, I'm driving you to the doctor's myself."

Smiling, the actress looked at her lover. She was so adorable sometimes, wanting to take care of her… that's how Victoria knew they were meant to be. If it was anyone else, Joy wouldn't even notice they were sick. "That's sweet, honey, but I really think that I'm okay."

Joy shrugged, walking toward her. She tucked a strand of hair behind Victoria's hair and gave her a soft smile. "You're still going."

"Fine, fine, I'll go… but not unless I'm still ill after dinner."

"Deal," the brunette said, stealing a kiss.

"Hey, how long is your meeting today?" Victoria questioned, looking at her with a satisfied smile. She couldn't get enough of Joy caring about her. It was her favorite thing in the entire world.

"Probably until at least noon. Why?"

"My segment only lasts until ten at the latest… but I'll just see if Melanie can come get me."

"Mel's out on Hank's boat until tomorrow night."

"Right… Let me drop you off at the meeting then, and I'll pick you up when you're done."

Joy nodded. It sounded like a great plan to her. In fact, it might save her a little time if she played her cards right. "Alright. Maybe you can run to the store if you don't mind?"

"No… not at all. I'll grab a few things and we can have a quiet night in tonight. As long as Elka doesn't come over, that is," Victoria added, rolling her eyes. She was getting a little more annoyed with the eldest woman now that she was involved with Joy. She saw the way that they treated each other before, but now she was finding it a little harder to let it go. She honestly did know it was all in good fun, but her protective side wanted to make sure no one hurt Joy ever again.

"I'll call Max… see if he can take her out. What do you think?"

"That would be wonderful. Maybe he can keep her at the senior center all night long," she teased.

Joy shook her head with a playful grin. "You ready to go?"

"Yes, I suppose," Victoria said before they headed down to the car. The actress dropped the fashionista off first, and then headed down to her on-location site, which happened to be a little farm that had been there for over a hundred years. Victoria found it to be rather boring, but when they were back in the studio working on touch ups, she had a strange sensation where she all of a sudden didn't feel sick anymore. In fact, she felt so strange that she decided to leave the studio right away.

She got into the car and dialed Joy's number, but she only got her voicemail. "Joy, it's me… call me back as soon as you get this. I'm headed to the store and then I really, really need to talk to you!" she hung up, before rushing to the supermarket.

Meanwhile, Joy saw that she had a missed call from Victoria, but only caught a break when the meeting was over. She tried to send a text during the meeting, but she needed all of her concentration to be on what was being discussed, so she quickly called Victoria for a ride after everyone else walked out of the room.

"Hey, where are you?"

"In the parking lot… I think I see you. Are you outside?"

Turning around, Joy saw Victoria in the car and waved. She rushed over to her and got in the car quickly.

"Did you need something when I was in the meeting? I tried to get back to you, but I couldn't really take my focus off of our meeting. We got so much done today, I actually feel like this is all coming together for me," Joy smiled, as Victoria nodded at her. She could tell that this was typical egotistical Victoria behavior, pretending she was listening but only so she could steal a second to talk about herself. But, she deserved it, Joy decided.

"I'm sorry… did you want to tell me something?"

"I… yes. Joy, I think I'm pregnant," Victoria revealed, her eyes sparkling brightly. She gave her the biggest smile Joy had seen in months, and it nearly melted Joy's heart. It absolutely thrilled her to see Victoria that happy again.

She had to be realistic, though. "Really? It hasn't even been a day yet," Joy looked at her carefully.

"I know, but I had this amazing experience today where I just felt like… like finally there was a child inside of me," she explained before adding, "and I feel ten thousand percent better."

Joy just looked at Victoria. She never experienced that when she was pregnant, and she'd never heard of anyone else experiencing it, either. "Honey, I don't think it's possible to tell the moment your egg's been fertilized…"

"I'm telling you, Joy, I'm pregnant," Victoria defended. She didn't say that she felt her egg being fertilized! All she said was that she thought she was pregnant all of a sudden. That could happen… couldn't it? Maybe not. She'd never experienced it with Oscar or Tony or Emmy, but then again, she wasn't really trying to have Tony or Emmy. Oscar was half planned… but that was another story.

"Okay, okay, if you think that, Victoria, that's wonderful. Let's just hope that it's true because otherwise, you're going to have your hopes up for nothing," Joy sighed, looking down at her lap for a moment, trying to calm herself down. She couldn't just jump into believing this.

Victoria just stared out the windshield. "Fine, don't get your hopes up. I know what's going on in my body… and you don't have to believe me."

"Babe, it's not that I don't believe you. It's just that I am so ready to become a mother and we decided that if it didn't work this time, we weren't going to try again. So, let's not get our hopes up. Let's just wait until we see the doctor," Joy pushed.

"Okay, like I said, you wait. I know this is our baby," Victoria said, giving herself a smile.

Joy closed her eyes and took a breath. She was just going to have to let Victoria have that. Hopefully she was pregnant, but she didn't want to have to mend a broken heard if she wasn't. She didn't want to have to mend her own broken heart, either.


	19. Chapter 19

Victoria decided to wait a while, but early on Saturday morning, three days after Melanie had returned home, she finally took out her purchase that she bought from the store almost a week ago. She was going to prove to Joy that she was right, she was carrying their child.

So, she went to the bathroom, used the little stick, and waited the manditory two minutes before reading the results to herself. She was nervous, but she was also excited… she had to know immediately. She had never been very good at being patient.

When she saw only one pink line, though, she sighed. The sigh radiated throughout her body and she felt heavy and tired. She thought that she might even cry, but she just wrapped it up in the same bag she bought it in and threw it out. She didn't want Melanie or Elka knowing that she had taken it, but she also didn't want Joy knowing. She knew that the test might not be correct and knew that she still had to wait to go to the hospital for a more accurate reading, but it broke her heart seeing the lone strip before her eyes.

She walked out into the livingroom to find Elka knitting on the couch. She was going to just head back up to bed, but Elka turned around and saw her.

"What are you doing up so early?" she asked, looking at the tall woman.

"I… I had to use the bathroom, but I'm headed back to bed."

"What's wrong?" Elka questioned, setting her needles and yarn down, looking at the woman carefully. She was an expert at reading expressions, even if Victoria did her best to mask her own.

"Nothing… I'm just tired."

"No, something's bothering you."

"I don't want to talk about it, Elka… I just want to go back upstairs and go back to sleep and forget this whole stupid morning," Victoria announced as her voice cracked and tears began pouring down her face.

"Oh, c'mere," Elka offered, standing up to embrace the younger woman. She lead Victoria to the couch where she cried for a few minutes, and then finally decided to wipe her tears. "Why don't you tell me what happened?"

"I… I just don't get it. How can someone be so sure of something and then have it turn out so completely different than how you thought it would be?" Victoria asked cryptically. She didn't want Elka knowing the truth! She would have so much to explain, and she just would not be able to handle that right now.

Elka paused. "You know, I'm reminded of my husband's affair with Lydia… I thought that he cheated on me, and then after he convinced me that he didn't, I was fine. Everything was fine. But come to find out, years after he died, he did cheat on me… and he has a son. I know that sometimes we expect something, but when the complete opposite situation occurs, we are so lost," she explained, only as Elka could. Afterall, not only was she wise beyond her years, but she was almost ninety years old. She knew a little something about everything.

"I feel lost," the actress whispered. "For the first time in my life, I actually thought I had done something right, and it felt so good… and now everything is falling apart."

"Is this about a man?"

Victoria shook her head honestly. "A man has nothing to do with it."

"Alright… does it have something to do with Joy? You two have been spending a lot of time together recently," Elka questioned, picking up her knitting again.

"It… it has something to do with… with my kids," she persuaded, not knowing how Joy would feel about her sharing their relationship with Elka.

The eldest woman raised her eyebrows. "What about them?"

Clearing her throat, Victoria finally said, "I've been doing a lot of thinking… that I haven't been the best mother I could have been for them when they were growing up, so I'm trying to change that, but at the same time, I've been trying to make myself happy, too… but they make me happy, and above anything else, I want for their happiness… and I want their love and acceptance like I'm sure they have wanted mine, too."

"I'm sure they love you, Victoria. Why wouldn't they accept you?"

"Do you know how many step-fathers they have been through? I just can't seem to make it work."

"I'm not following."

"I… I want them to accept me no matter who I see, especially if I truly love someone and want to make our relationship work."

Elka nodded slowly. "So, this is about a man," she concluded.

Victoria avoided eye contact for a moment, and then looked at Elka. "W-would you think of me differently if I said it was about a… woman?"

"You wanted to make a sex tape with a woman, why would I think of you any differently now?" Elka asked, shaking her head, continuing to knit like nothing out of the ordinary had been spoken.

Victoria breathed out a huge sigh of relief that she didn't know she had pent up in her system. "I did, didn't I?"

"So, now you want to have sex with women that you don't tape? Or do you still want to make it into a movie, because that whole idea was a little strange…"

"Well, a woman. And no, I don't want to tape it."

"Then tell your kids that. Honey, they are your kids and they love you no matter what. They're going to accept you and love you just as much as they did before."

With a bitter scoff, Victoria added, "Which wasn't much to begin with."

"Maybe there's some distance between you and your kids right now, but you can patch up those holes if you try," Elka promised, looking at her with a gentle smile.

Victoria nodded, although that wasn't the present problem on her mind, this one had been laid out for her. Now all she had to do was fix it. She then hugged Elka and said, "Thank you Elka. Really, this meant a lot to me… I… I haven't really spoken to the girls about this yet, so if we can keep this between us, I'd really appreciate it."

"Of course."

"Thank you… and I really do want to go back to sleep, so I guess I'll see you a little later."

Elka nodded, but wondered what else was bothering the woman. She decided that Victoria and Joy had probably been hanging around each other so much because of Victoria's "children" issues, but something else seemed off with the actress. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, so she would just have to ask Joy when she got up.


	20. Chapter 20

"Hey Victoria," Joy called, walking into the kitchen. She had just gotten a text from Melanie letting her know that she would be home in about an hour with dinner. Joy was on her way back from Elka's part of the house, and needed to talk to the other woman.

"Yeah?" Victoria asked, walking into the kitchen moments later.

"Elka, she's worried about you. She said I needed to talk to you about something you told her."

"Oh, no… I needed someone to talk to early this morning, and didn't want to wake you, and somehow she pried it out of me that I was into a woman now instead of men. That's all."

Joy pursed her lips. "Okay, well, she told me that part, and she asked me not to say anything because she thought I knew, but I said I didn't."

Victoria then looked at her, a little confused. "Then what is she worried about?"

"She said you came out of the bathroom and started crying this morning."

"Ahh… yes, I was overtired, so I suppose that's why I sort of told her I'm in love with you… well, I didn't say you, but I did say a woman."

The younger woman looked at her lover carefully. "Why were you really crying?"

The actress looked at her, narrowing her eyebrow. "I just told you. I was overtired."

"Victoria, you may have won an Emmy for acting, but I don't believe it for a second. You hardly ever cry."

"Well, I was tired. Sometimes I get moody… I don't know what else you want to hear," she said, opening the refrigerator to grab something to eat, trying to ignore Joy as much as possible. She did not want to talk about the subject anymore.

"The truth."

Victoria just closed the door and looked at Joy before she snapped. "I gave you time when you didn't want to talk to me, and I would really appreciate you giving me the same respect!"

Joy's eyes widened. Victoria had never spoken to her like that before… at least not while they had been in a relationship. "O-okay. You let me know when you're ready," she said softly, turning to head up the stairs.

"Oh, Joy… wait! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to be so cold. I just… something happened this morning and I don't… I don't know how to tell you."

Taking a breath, Joy looked at Victoria gently. "Just say it, Tori. You know you can tell me anything."

Nodding, Victoria replied, "I know… I just don't want to hurt you," as her voice cracked for the second time that day and she began crying.

Now worried herself, Joy pulled her into a tight hug and let her cry. When she was finally finished sobbing, she nearly fell into the chair at the table. Joy sat down next to her and ran her fingers through her hair lovingly.

"Tell me, baby… you'll feel better when you get it out."

"I… I took a pregnancy test today and it came back negative," Victoria admitted, and once again tears began to fall from her eyes as she got more upset with every word she spoke. "I just wanted this to work for us, Joy, and I feel like such a failure."

Joy's heart broke, hearing Victoria's words. Why hadn't she waited until their appointment? Why didn't Victoria want her there so they could read the results together? Why was it negative? It didn't matter now… all that mattered was Victoria. "You are not a failure. Whether we get pregnant or not, you are not a failure. You are Victoria Chase. Emmy award winner Victoria Chase, that is," Joy told her, hoping to boost her spirits.

Shaking her head, Victoria said, "Right now the only thing I want to be is pregnant."

"So, maybe we should try again. Just one more time?"

"I…" Victoria considered the option. She knew she didn't want to go through the procedure again, but she also knew she didn't want to feel this useless and weak ever again. "Yeah… one more time."

"And if that doesn't work, then we won't do it again."

Nodding, the actress just put her head in her hands, mourning her hypothetical child. Joy wrapped her arm around her and rest her head against Victoria's shoulder, also feeling sad about her sweetheart not being pregnant.


	21. Chapter 21

The following week, after moping around the house, Victoria brought herself to head down to the hospital to have her pregnancy test taken. Joy accompanied her, of course, and after Victoria had her blood drawn, they left.

"You know, if you keep saying you already know it's negative, then it's going to be negative," Joy reminded her partner, driving the car back to their house. That was what Victoria had been saying throughout this entire experience, but now she was retracting her word.

"Well, it is. I already took the test and I'm tired of waiting. I just want to schedule another appointment so we can try again," Victoria pushed, annoyed with what Joy was saying to her.

"Let's just see how this goes first."

"I already know how it's gonna go," the actress mumbled. "Can we at least get some breakfast while we wait then? I haven't been able to eat this morning and I'm starving."

Joy looked over at Victoria. "Are you sure you aren't pregnant? You sure are moody this morning."

Apparently, though, Victoria didn't find her comment humorous, and turned her head to look out the window. "Nevermind breakfast. I just want to go home."

"Oh, c'mon Victoria. I'll buy you a fruit parfait from Peter's," Joy offered, knowing that was where her favorite breakfast came from. She regretted her last comment, but it was too late to take it back now.

"No. I want to go home," Victoria told her stubbornly, masking her sadness over her unsuccessful pregnancy.

Joy sighed to herself and began taking Victoria to their house. When they arrived, Victoria went to her room and locked herself in, and once again, began crying. Joy knew what was going on, but also knew that this was something Victoria needed to deal with by herself. When she needed Joy, she'd let her know.

A little while later, Joy had prepared breakfast for herself, Melanie, and Elka, and they all ate together. Victoria wandered in during the middle of the breakfast, though, and looked at Joy with red, puffy eyes.

"I left some fruit for you in the refrigerator," Joy told her gently.

"Thanks… I actually just came down to let you know I just got off the phone with my doctor and I have another appointment in two weeks. Do you mind driving me?" she asked, without pulling Joy out of the room.

"Wait, wait, wait. Victoria, is everything okay? Are you sick?" Melanie asked quickly, looking up with wide eyes.

Victoria looked at Melanie and realized that what she said in front of her and Elka would have an affect on everyone in the room. She looked at Joy who's eyes were open in shock over what Victoria said, and Elka just looked at Victoria the same way Melanie was looking at her, except Melanie was now up out of her chair and over by her friend.

"No, no… I didn't mean to worry you guys. I… I had to get a routine check up this morning and Joy took me. I have anemia so I have to go back in two weeks to get rechecked," she cleared up, looking at the women. It was a damn good thing she had taken three improvisation classes in college for extra electives.

"Then why have you been crying?" Melanie asked, rubbing her shoulder gently.

"I… I'm going through something with my kids right now… but I'm sure that everything will work out," she told Melanie, hoping Elka would be satisfied with what she had told her a week ago about being in love with a woman.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Thank you for offering, but I really think I should just talk it out with my kids."

Nodding, Melanie said, "Well, you know we're always here for you."

Victoria gave Melanie a soft smile, and then headed back upstairs to sulk.

"I have never seen her this upset… not even when Susan Lucci won the Emmy after she tackled the triple role on Edge of Tomorrow. I think I should go talk to her," Melanie said, moving to get up.

"Why don't we let Joy go talk to her," Elka suggested, looking at Joy carefully.

"Me? Why me?" Joy nearly gasped, playing it smoothly. She needed to go talk to Victoria.

"Because she wants you to take her to the doctor's next week. Trust me, she wants to talk to you," Elka shrugged, giving Joy a nod.

"A-alright. I'll be back," Joy said, heading up the stairs to see Victoria. Honestly, she wasn't sure that the woman was ready to talk to her, but she knocked on the door, and eventually, Victoria opened it, and began crying again.

"She said it was negative," she sobbed, nearly falling into Joy's arms.

"Honey… you've got to find a way to move past this. Especially if you want to try again. This isn't the Victoria I know and love."

"Yes it is! I am trying to have a baby to make you happy! How can I not be the person you know, or more importantly love?!" the actress yelled.

"Stop it! Right now! You want this baby just as badly as I do, so you cannot tell me you are doing this soley for me! You were the one who already took the pregnancy test! And you knew this only worked less than half of the time, so you will not blame your mood on me!" Joy yelled back, feeling her temper rise.

"I'm not blaming you! I'm telling you that I am the woman you love! I am doing this out of love!"

"But you're doing this for yourself, too, Victoria! It seems like you're more upset than I am, and I was the one who wanted to have a baby! Not you!"

"Why are you being so mean to me?" Victoria finally questioned, as she began to cry again.

Joy took a sharp breath. "I'm sorry… I'm not trying to be mean. I'm trying to make you see that this isn't the end of the world. You've waited how many years to tell me you love me? And how many years have I waited to have another child? We can wait two weeks to try again."

"But like you said, we've already waited so long… I just really, really thought this time was the time. I thought I felt it. I thought… I thought there was something different about this time," she cried.

"Maybe there was, but listen, we are going to get through this. We are going to make this work. But right now I need you to be strong, Tori. I need you to wipe your tears and come downstairs with me. Melanie is so worried, and Elka… she's worried, too. So, please, come down to the kitchen with me, and let's get through these next two weeks so we can try again."

Victoria looked at Joy and nodded. She knew Joy was right. So, she ran her hands over her eyes roughtly, went to her vanity to fix her make-up, and stared at herself in the mirror, promising herself that she wouldn't cry anymore about this. She got up, put a gentle smile on her face, and looked at Joy.

"I love you, you know?"

"I do know… and I love you, too," Joy said, giving her a hug, kissing her forehead.


	22. Chapter 22

The next two weeks Victoria really faked it until she made it. She felt much better after a few days of spending time with her friends, and even talked to her kids. Emmy came to visit, Oscar video chatted with her for over three hours one night, and Tony called her on the phone at least twice a day every other day. She managed to tell them all that she had found love with a woman, and they all seemed very happy for her. To them, it made her more "real". They were happy that she was sharing her life with them. She didn't tell them it was Joy, but she did say that once the time was right, she wanted them all to meet her.

So, when she and Joy went in for their final proceedure, Victoria felt ready to take on whatever came her way. She had her children, her friends, and her Joy. She was sure that she had more love in the world than anyone else because of those people.

"Are you sure you're ready?" Joy asked, sitting in the seat beside the examination table, holding Victoria's hand tightly. She was extremely supportive, and Victoria was very grateful.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, if this doesn't take, are you going to be able to handle it?"

Victoria thought for a brief moment before she nodded. She'd had a lot of time to think about this, and she was sure of her answer. "Yes… because if this doesn't work, we'll just have to… we'll have to do something else. Adoption, surrogacy… I don't know."

"Tori, if this doesn't work, I will be happy with you alone. I really will be."

"R-really?"

"Yes," Joy nodded. Truthfully, she had been thinking a lot about the same subject lately, and she wanted to assure Victoria that even without a child, she was blissfully elated in her life. "But will you be happy? With just me and no child?"

Victoria pursed her lips. She hadn't expected Joy to say that… but it made her stop and think about everything that she had. "Yeah… I, I will be. I just thought you wanted this child so much, and now you've got me wanting another baby, too."

"So, let's hope this works. But if not, let's give it a rest. You have three beautiful children, and I have a wonderful son. It's not like we don't share enough love between the two of us," Joy smiled, squeezing her hand.

"No, you're right. We absolutely do," Victoria smiled at the woman sitting beside her.

A few moments passed between them, before Joy asked, "Where do you think Dr. Martin is? She usually doesn't even give us two minutes before she's here."

"Maybe there was an emergency," the actress suggested, taking in her surroundings. She hadn't even noticed that the doctor was late. "I'm not really in a rush anyway… it's nice to just be alone with you."

The brunette smiled. "It's nice to be alone with you, too," Joy said, standing up to lean over the table and give her partner a kiss.

"You know," the now taller woman said, after catching her breath. Victoria's arm somehow got wrapped around her neck, keeping Joy nice and close. "We never really established what we are…"

"What we are?"

"You know, to each other? Are we best friends, are we lovers, are you… my girlfriend?"

Smiling like a school girl, Victoria teased, "Do you want me to be your girlfriend?"

"I suppose so. Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

With a little laugh, she replied, "I suppose so!"

"Okay… girlfriend," Joy nearly giggled.

Victoria adored how cute she was, and pulled her in for another kiss. She loved when they were like this. They were both happy. They weren't fighting, there was no drama, they were alone. She wanted to spend her life in Joy's arms.

"I love you, girlfriend."

"I love you, too, girlfriend."

After Joy sat back down, Dr. Martin came in as if on queue. Victoria couldn't have timed a better entrance if she was directing a play.

"Sorry I'm late," she started, looking over the chart in front of her with a questioning look written across her face.

"Are we ready to start?" Joy asked, looking at the woman who was quite enticed by the folder in her hands.

"Actually, we won't be doing the proceedure today," she said, closing the chart, looking at the women.

"Why not? We… we don't want to wait any longer to get pregnant," Victoria told her, now worried about what she might say. She didn't want to have any health issues that would affect her pregnancy, but even more than that, she didn't want anything holding her back from becoming pregnant.

"No, no, I understand. But I actually was in the lab before this, going over some of the results from your tests a couple of weeks ago," she explained, looking at Victoria.

"Wh-what's wrong? Can I not get pregnant? Is that why the proceedure hasn't taken?" Victoria said, feeling herself grow more nauseous with even syllable that escaped her lips. She didn't want anything to potentially harm her baby, either, and it scared her that Dr. Martin was being so serious. She felt as though her body had betrayed her in some way.

"Actually, quite the contrary. The test results a few weeks ago were actually found to be contaminated, so we rushed the sample on the blood we took from you when you first arrived. Congratulations, Mommies! You're pregnant!"

Victoria's jaw nearly dropped to the floor, and before she even turned to Joy, who's eyes were almost buldging out of her eyes, her girlfriend grabbed her and kissed her. Not only was it passionate, but it was a kiss of true, utter love.

"Oh my God…" Victoria said, after the kiss had broken. She just about fell onto the ground, but instead just let her body rest against the pillows behind her so that she could take in the news she was just given.

"You were right! You were right, Victoria!" Joy told her, giving the doctor a hug. "Oh, thank you so much!"

"You're very welcome. I'm going to perscribe some pre-natal vitamins and run a few more tests, but I'd like to see you back in about four weeks to do the first ultra-sound."

Victoria nodded readily, and looked at Joy who seemed more excited than she did, if that was even possible.


	23. Chapter 23

The women spent the next couple of weeks sneaking into each other's rooms and sleeping in the same bed at night. They knew this couldn't go on forever, so somewhere during the third week of doing that, Joy snuck into Victoria's room and flicked the light on.

"Joy!" Victoria yelped, covering her eyes with her hands to make the light go away.

"We need to talk."

"About what? Can we talk with the light off?"

"No. This is serious, Victoria."

Victoria struggled to open her eyes and move her hands to finally sit up, so the process took much longer than necessary. Also, she was being dramatic, as she always was, and Joy rolled her eyes in annoyance. "Okay, I'm awake. What do you want to talk about?"

"I think we really need to consider telling Elka and Melanie about us."

"Right now? I don't think either one of them will be very supportive if we drag them out of their beds at one in the morning. Especially if the lights are on," the actress glared.

"No, not right now, but soon. You're going to start showing in a couple months if not weeks. I just want everything to be out in the open before your pregnancy is too far along."

Victoria nodded. "I understand and I even agree. What I don't understand, though, is why you couldn't have told me this with the lights off."

With a defeated sigh, Joy turned the light off and went to get into bed with her girlfriend.

"What do you think we should say?" Victoria asked quietly, letting Joy slip into the bed behind her. She was going to just close her eyes and go to sleep, but now she started to thinking about everything. What would they say? How would Elka take it? How would Melanie react?

"Maybe we can tell them that we're dating and we've decided to have a baby together?" Joy stated sarcastically.

Victoria lightly slapped Joy's thigh, lovingly. "I mean, how should we go about it?"

"Well, I was kind of thinking that since you're the actress, you'd be able to figure it out for us."

"God, you're just hilarious tonight."

"I'm sorry… I was just getting you back for teasing me about the light."

Victoria rolled over and kissed her gently. "It's a good thing I love you."

"I love you, too… and I love our baby," she said, placing her hands on Victoria's flat stomach.

"Mmm… me, too."

"You know what we haven't done in a while?" Joy whispered.

"What?"

"This," she said, groping her girlfriend's ass suggestively.

"Babe, I'm too tired tonight."

With a sigh, Joy moved back over to her spot and reminded her, "You're always too tired." She sounded angry, and that made Victoria upset.

"I am pregnant, I'm sorry. I'd love to fuck you right now, but I am just too tired. Especially at this time of night."

"Before your check-up?"

"Absolutely. Let me sleep and I'll be more than willing to participate tomorrow night," Victoria bribed, hoping to rid herself and Joy of the moods that washed over them suddenly.

"Alright. Goodnight sweetheart."

"Goodnight."

Joy watched Victoria sleep for a while and thought about telling Melanie and Elka about their relationship. She knew that it would be easier for Elka to take in than it would be for Melanie. Not that she had a problem with relationships between the same sexes, but Melanie was their best friend. Joy assumed she was going to think they lied to her.

She closed her eyes and thought about how she was going to tell Melanie about herself and Victoria but eventually, exhaustion caught up with her and she fell asleep.


	24. Chapter 24

The next night, Melanie and Victoria were seated on the couch talking when Joy walked in from her day at the salon. Now that it was coming together, it was like she had an actual job again.

"Hey," she smiled at them and went over to sit next to Melanie since Victoria was seated in the single chair next to the bigger couch.

"Hey, how was your day, Joy?" Victoria asked immediately, giving her a smile.

"Good… I got a lot done today. Plus, I brought us all home a few samples of shampoo I'd like to use, but only if it works. I figure since we all have pretty fabulous hair, we could try it out."

Melanie nodded. "Great! I'm in… my hair could use something new."

"Did you two have a nice day, too?" Joy asked, looking to Victoria and then to Melanie.

"Well, I taped a few segments, but other than that I've just been here with Elka and Mel. She had to go grab something from the store, but she should be back any minute," Victoria noted, now realizing Elka had been gone for just about long enough to run to the store. Although, at her pace…

"And I submitted a few chapters of my new book to my publisher, so we'll see how that goes," Melanie told Joy with a smile.

"That's great, Mel! Really! I'm sure she'll love what you've written."

"Thanks… you two have plans for the night?"

"Actually-" Joy started, but was cut off.

"Why? Do you have plans for the night?" Victoria interrupted, wanting to let Melanie tell them what she was doing first.

Blushing, the shorter woman replied, "Hank invited me to have dinner on his boat, and asked if I could stay the night. Do you guys mind? I know it's our "Bachelor" night," she questioned, referring to the show that she and Joy often watched together every Monday night. Since it was November now, the season was finishing up, and even though Melanie was pretty into it, she was also very much into her boyfriend.

"No, you go have fun! Maybe I can get Victoria to watch it with me," she winked, as Victoria rolled her eyes.

Just then, Elka walked through the door, sighing, "All I'm saying is that it would be nice to get away from these girls once in a while. You could invite me over to spend the night, you know?"

Max was following behind her and carrying a few bags, before seeing the ladies in the room. "Oh, hi girls! I'm just helping Elka… she asked me to go shopping," he smiled.

"Hello!" Melanie said cheerfully.

"Hi Max," Victoria smiled.

"Hey Max," Joy said, before looking at Elka and then back at the man. "You know, we could use a night away from the old bat, why don't you keep her over night tonight?"

"I guess you're all right. I just don't want the center to find out she's practically been living with me! Otherwise they'll start charging me extra!"

"I'll pay them to take her," Joy said, before Elka glared at her.

"Ladies, ladies… Elka, if you want to stay with me tonight, you know you are more than welcome."

Elka turned to Max and kissed his cheek. "Aw, thank you Max. Let me just put this away and grab a few things."

"Here, let me help you," Melanie offered, taking Elka's grocery bags and heading to the kitchen with her and Max, leaving Victoria and Joy alone.

"So, we have the house to ourselves," Joy said with a devilish grin.

"My intention the entire time," Victoria said simply, getting up of the couch to hug Joy.

The younger woman kissed her lips quickly and said, "I can't wait until tonight."

"Me either… I'm very energized after my relaxing day."

"Speaking of relaxing, do you mind if we order out tonight? I don't feel like cooking."

"That sounds perfect. I'd really like Chinese if that works for you."

Licking her lips, Joy nodded. "Oh, that sounds delicious! I'm starving."

"Did you eat today, babe?" Victoria asked with concern.

"I had brunch, but I didn't get around to grabbing anything on my way home. I'll be fine until dinner, though, I promise," she smiled, touching her girlfriend's hand softly.

And she was. After Max, Elka, and Melanie left, Victoria and Joy got Chinese for dinner and after they finished, they were both stuffed. They both headed upstairs to Joy's room where Joy stripped Victoria of her clothes and Victoria did the same to Joy.

"I love that your belly is going to be bigger soon," Joy cooed, touching Victoria's flat stomach gently.

"I don't love that it's going to be bigger, but I do love that our baby's in there… that he or she is going to live in there for quite a while," she smiled, biting her lip at the thought.

"Are we going to find out what we're having?"

"Don't you think we should? That way we can plan accordingly."

"Oh, yes… I just wasn't sure where you stood on the issue," Joy nodded, already thinking about their unborn baby.

"Well, now you do… where do you stand on getting over here to kiss me?" Victoria asked, as Joy moved up the bed to kiss Victoria's lips. Their tongues fought a passionate battle with one another, twirling, dancing, wrestling, until both women were out of breath.

Pulling back, Victoria began to kiss down Joy's body, kissing the younger woman's breasts for a few moments before continuing. She licked down her slender stomach and finally to her thighs. Parting them slowly, the actress made her way into the nook Joy's legs formed and Victoria got to work. She lapped at her core, rubbing over her clit every couple of moments, and then, when Joy was ready, Victoria pushed her fingers inside of her walls while her tongue stroked her sensitive bud.

"Jesus…" Joy moaned, pushing Victoria's head into her, raising her legs simultaneously. Her eyes were closed and as soon as she felt the tension in her body rise, she began thrusting against Victoria's fingers.

"Oh… Victoria! Please… just a little more, baby…"

"Come for me, Joy!" Victoria urged, before finally pushing her over the edge. Immediately, the couple went back to kissing and instead of Joy returning the favor, Victoria asked if they could just cuddle before they fell asleep together.


	25. Chapter 25

Finally, the day of the ultra-sound was here! Joy and Victoria were beyond excited about seeing their child for the first time, and they could not have been brought into the examination room fast enough.

Victoria began to fidget, which almost never happened, but as soon as she did, Joy took her hand.

"You okay?"

"I will be… I just don't want anything to go wrong."

"Then think positively, honey. Don't think about anything going wrong. Think about how we're going to see our child… maybe even hear the heartbeat today, Victoria! It's going to be life changing," she promised, giving her girlfriend a gentle smile.

Victoria nodded. "I'm just worried."

"Well, maybe I can take your mind off of that," Joy suggested, getting up and moving to the table where Victoria was sitting. She began kissing her lips and when she went to move her hand up under Victoria's shirt, the actress stopped her.

"We can't, babe. Not here," she breathed, cupping Joy's face.

Joy nodded. "Okay… I'll behave," she told Victoria, defeated.

Seeing her pout, Victoria smiled. "Aww, I think I can make it up to you later."

Before Joy could respond, the door opened, and Dr. Martin came in.

"Good morning ladies," she smiled at them, setting Victoria's chart down on the stand next to her seat. She began to get the sonogram machine ready, and moments later, the monitor powered on. "Ready to see your baby?"

The women smiled at one another and then nodded at the doctor. "We're ready."

"Great. Victoria, I'm going to need you to lift up your shirt. If it's easier, you can take it off. And just pull your pants down just a little bit."

Victoria began to take off her thermal shirt and handed it to Joy before she pushed her yoga pants down a few inches. She laid back on the table and took a deep breath, hoping to calm her fears.

"You haven't gained any weight, but that's normal. Have you had any morning sickness?" the doctor asked, jotting down a few things in Victoria's file.

Shaking her head, Victoria said, "No… but… I have had some cramping the past couple of days," she admitted, averting her eyes from Joy.

"What?! Victoria… why didn't you tell me? Did you come down here to get checked out?"

"No… I called your nurse, but she said since I had an appointment today, I should be fine. I wasn't bleeding, and she said it was probably normal."

"Alright, well, let's see, okay? Any soreness? Numbness? Anything out of the ordinary?"

"My boobs hurt," Victoria said bluntly, after waiting for a moment to really think about the question.

"Is that why you don't want to have sex?" Joy asked.

Victoria's eyes widened and she looked at Joy. "Really? You wanna talk about that here?"

"You know what, that's completely normal. You probably won't have a sex drive for a few weeks, but in a few months, Joy may not be able to keep up."

Joy raised her eyebrows. "Hmm… I guess Dr. Martin doesn't know me very well then," she smiled playfully.

"Maybe not," she said, before squirting some gel on Victoria's stomach. She then placed the wand on, beginning to search for their baby.

Joy once again took Victoria's hand as they both looked up at the screen. They didn't see anything but grey, fuzzy matter, and for a moment, that was all Victoria expected to see.

"Alright… I can't find the fetus, but hold on," Dr. Martin said, replacing the wand back on Victoria's stomach, looking again.

"I'm nervous," Victoria whispered to Joy with tears in her eyes, fearing for the worst.

"Hold on, she'll find our baby," Joy told her softly, squeezing her hand. She stroked Victoria's hair with her other hand, wanting to sooth her, but she couldn't.

The doctor lifted the wand once more. "Let me just try once more, alright?"

After the wand was placed back on Victoria's abdomen for the third time, Dr. Martin moved it just a little lower than where she placed it, and finally got an image.

"Oh! Look… here's your baby," she said with a relief in her voice, looking at the women cheerfully.

Victoria, who was on the verge of breaking down into sobs, looked at the screen and felt her breath leave her lungs momentarily. She could not explain what came over her, but she did feel changed. Finally, she looked at Joy, who seemed to have experienced something similar.

Joy saw the fetus and her heart skipped a beat. She was never that thankful to be herself before. She felt so blessed. That was her child on the screen, and she had never been happier. She looked at Victoria and kissed her lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Do you see the heart beating? I'm going to print you out a few pictures, and take a couple of measurements, alright?"

"That's our baby… our beautiful baby, Joy," Victoria said, wiping her tears.

Joy nodded, brushing away her own. "I know, Tori… I can never thank you enough for making this happen."

"You made this happen, too," she reminded, giving her a smile.

Joy nodded before the sonogram was over and they recieved their pictures. While Victoria was getting her clothes back on, Joy was staring at the pictures, so overwhelmed with love. She could not wait to really see her child for the first time. She hadn't realized just how magical this whole experience was until now.


	26. Chapter 26

Later that evening, after Joy and Victoria had both gone to work and come back home, they were sitting on Joy's bed together, and the younger woman looked at her partner.

"I think we have to tell Melanie and Elka."

"Can't we just enjoy this first? For a week or so? Just us? I… I'm not ready for them to know about us, or about the baby… not yet. Do you mind if we wait?"

Joy shook her head. "We just can't wait for too long. You're going to start showing soon, and I think it's going to be hard enough telling them about our relationship. On top of that, we have to tell them we're expecting a baby together."

Victoria nodded. "Alright. Let's tell them after Thanksgiving… as a surprise," she smiled.

"I'm just worried about how Melanie might take it…"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean she's our friend, Victoria. She's going to think that we've been keeping this from her because we didn't want her to know. That's not the case, but I just feel like it's going to be really hard for her…"

Victoria wrapped her arm around Joy lovingly. "You know what? She kept Hank from us and we let it go, so maybe she'll understand. Don't worry about that, Joy. Let's just be happy we have each other and we have this baby on the way. If Melanie really is our friend, she'll understand."

Leaning her head on her girlfriend's shoulder, Joy sighed. "I suppose so. I'm just so scared of losing her as our friend."

"We won't, honey. I promise."

The two sat together for a little while until they heard a knock at the door. Joy got up to get it, and smiled when Melanie was at the door.

"Hey… I just wanted to come up and talk to you… oh, hi, Victoria," Melanie said, seeing Victoria sitting on the bed.

"Hey, Mel…" the actress smiled. She took the hint that Melanie was not there to see her, so she patted stood up and placed her hand gently on Joy's shoulder. "You know what? I need to get something to drink… meet me on the porch later?"

"Sure," Joy smiled, placing her hand on Victoria's lightly, and then letting her go.

"I'm sorry… I didn't interrupt anything, right?" Melanie grimaced, closing the door behind her as she walked into Joy's room.

"No, no… she was just keeping me company," Joy assured her. "What's on your mind?"

"Well, it's Hank. He, uh… he proposed," she told her friend, as tears sprung to her eyes.

The taller brunette gasped, taken aback. "He proposed? Gosh, Mel, that seems so soon."

"That's what I said… when I turned him down," Melanie said, covering her mouth, wishing the words had never escaped her mouth when she was with Hank.

Joy sighed, pulling her into a hug. "I'm sorry, honey. Do… do you still want to be with him?"

"Of course I do. I love him so much, Joy, but it was just too fast. And now, I don't know if he wants to be with me… he just got on his boat and left. He didn't say goodbye or anything," she shook her head, before whispering, "He looked so crushed."

"Oh, Melanie… he just needs some time to think. He took a big step, and maybe he's just realizing now that it was much too quick for you. It was soon for him, too. He just recently got out of his marriage."

"That's what I thought! I… I'm still not completely over my divorce, and I can't imagine he is either."

"Well, maybe he's not. Maybe that's why he proposed… I don't know," Joy shrugged.

"And I think I do want to marry him… someday. I just don't want to move so quickly. Anders and I took things too fast and I really regret that about us. I'm not going to let that happen again. I want to really know him first," she admitted.

"I completely understand."

"So, what do you think I should do?"

"Call him. Ask him to talk… and maybe tell him you're free a couple of days from now. That way you can think everything over and decide on exactly what you want to say," Joy offered.

Melanie nodded, taking in Joy's suggestion. "That sounds good… that's why I came to you. I knew you could help me," she smiled at her best friend.

"I'm glad I could help. And you know you can talk to me anytime," the British woman told her. "I think you know you can talk to Victoria, too."

"I know… I just didn't want to load anymore on top of her. She seemed to be going through a lot lately. She does look a lot happier, though… over the past few weeks. I've noticed she's gone back to her old self," Melanie nodded.

"I think she's really happy right now," Joy smiled, feeling the same way Victoria was feeling.

"You look like you are, too. I can't believe how much your salon has impacted your mood."

"Me, either," Joy said awkwardly, raising her eyebrows, not wanting to lie, but knowing she had to honor her agreement with Victoria.

"Well, we should get down to the porch. I'm afraid there won't be any wine left if we leave Victoria alone down there for too long," Melanie kidded.

With a playful smile, Joy followed Melanie down to see Victoria, knowing the shorter haired woman wouldn't be having any alcohol for quite some time.


	27. Chapter 27

The week after the ultra sound was Thanksgiving. While Joy, Melanie, and Elka were in the kitchen making dinner, Victoria was busy setting up Christmas decorations in the livingroom. It was a tradition she and Melanie had in their houses while their children were growing up that the day after Thanksgiving, the kids would decorate for Christmas. When they moved to Cleveland, though, they found they were much too tired after shopping on Black Friday to decorate. So, since Victoria couldn't really cook, she offered to decorate.

"Mmm… smells good in here!" Victoria said, walking into the kitchen with sparkly remenants from some of the fake snow all over her hands.

"Hey, back away from the food, Lady GaGa! Don't shake your glitter off here!" Elka said, looking at the woman who was almost at the sink.

"Elka! I just want to wash my hands."

"Bathroom, Victoria," Melanie directed. "How's the decorating going?"

"Alright… I need to borrow your heels, though, for some of the window clings, Joy."

"They're up in my closet," Joy told her, not even turning around from her pot of brussel sprouts… her favorite dish!

"No, I looked… I'm trying to find a specific pair," she said, tapping her foot lightly.

Joy then looked away from her food and saw the look in Victoria's eye. "Oh, you know what… I may have stuck them in one of the boxes under my bed. Let me help you find them," she said, handing her spoon to Elka. "Look over this?"

"Don't take all day?" Elka asked sarcastically.

Joy and Victoria headed up the stairs and went into Joy's room.

"Are you okay? You looked worried," Joy told Victoria, her voice dripping with concern.

"I'm fine and so is the baby… but Joy… I know I asked you to postpone before, but I've been thinking. I just don't want to ruin Thanksgiving or our shopping trip tomorrow. Do you mind if we wait? Like you said, I won't be able to hide it for much longer anyway…" Victoria explained, looking at Joy cautiously.

The longer haired woman shrugged. "If that's what you want, then we'll wait."

"Oh, thank you, Joy! The girls are really going to appreciate this."

"I hope so…" Joy said, shaking her head gently.

Victoria kissed Joy's cheek. "They will. And maybe just one more favor?"

Joy looked at Victoria sternly, giving her an annoyed look.

"A tiny one?" she asked, holding her thumb and pointer finger out about an inch apart from one another, showing her how tiny it was.

"What?"

"Steal me something to eat from the kitchen? I'm starving…"

Rolling her eyes playfully, Joy nearly pushed Victoria out the door by the small of her back. "C'mon Mommy…"

Later that night, as they finished their feast, all of the women headed to bed early, but Joy was awake, sneaking into Victoria's room after Melanie turned her light off.

"Are you still up, Tori?" she whispered, peaking in through the door.

"Yeah… come in."

"Mind if I sleep with you?"

"Of course not, Joy… c'mere," she said, pulling up her blankets to create an opening. Joy crawled in and Victoria held her tightly. "I love you, Joy."

"I love you, too."

"Thank you for not making me tell Elka and Melanie today… thank you so much."

"Honey, you should know by now, I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to."

"I do know that… I do. I just love you so much and want to be with you for real, but I want to do it when the time feels right," she nodded against her girlfriend.

"Then let's do it when the time feels right. Let's not set a date… let's just say it when we both know it's time," she whispered, turning her head to look at the older woman.

Victoria stole a kiss and with that, the deal was made. They both fell asleep peacefully that night, and when they woke up the next morning, they shopped with Melanie and met up with Elka to have lunch. By the time Black Friday concluded, they all agreed that they had a lovely Thanksgiving holiday.


	28. Chapter 28

When Christmas came around, the ladies were excited. They exchanged gifts and ate Christmas dinner together quite early that afternoon. Afterward, Melanie headed to Hank's house for the evening while Max took Elka to the senior center for another dinner, leaving Victoria and Joy home alone.

"Did you ever think we'd be spending Christmas together? I mean, as a couple?" Joy asked, sitting on the couch with her girlfriend, touching her stomach gently. She liked feeling that she was closer to the baby by being close to Victoria.

Victoria shrugged pensively. "I've certainly thought about it, but let me tell you, this is much better than I ever imagined, Joy. We're becoming a family, and the thought of that…" she said, shaking her head, temporarily consumed with emotion. Her hormones were starting to affect her at random moments like these, and she hated it.

"Is beautiful," Joy finished for her, kissing her cheek, not wanting Victoria to get upset, but wanting her to realize that it made her very happy, too. "And since we're here, I have a few gifts for you."

"I have a couple of gifts for you, too," Victoria grinned after calming herself down. She hated the feeling of being consumed with emotion, but she was glad that she had the chance to be. Without the baby growing inside of her, she knew her life wouldn't feel as complete as it did. Both women headed to different parts of the house after they stood up, and then met up in the livingroom next to the Christmas tree.

Victoria handed Joy a lovely wrapped box, while Joy gave Victoria a large bag. They both opened their presents and Joy revealed a pair of black boots with a nice heel, while Victoria took out a few outfits.

"Are these maternity clothes?" Victoria marvelled, looking through the outfits that she actually liked. The colors ranged from green to pink to black to red, and they all had room for a growing belly. Joy smiled at her as she looked through them, pleased with Joy's taste in fashion, especially maternity fashion.

"I picked them out because I knew eventually you'd need them, and I knew you wouldn't want to buy them yourself," she grinned before asking, "How did you know these were the boots I wanted? And how did you get them? They've been out of stock since I spotted them!"

"I do have connections, you know? I saw you eyeing them in like, three different magazines, and I noticed you didn't have them, so I thought I'd just help you out… plus, you'll look so sexy in them," Victoria purred, kissing Joy's cheek.

Next Joy passed Victoria a tiny box while Victoria exchanged a small bag, and they both smiled upon opening their gifts. Both were from Tiffany's, and Victoria got a lovely heart-latched necklace while Joy pulled out diamond earrings. They shared smiles, as Joy tucked her gift away and Victoria asked for help putting the necklace on.

"This looks beautiful on you," Joy whispered, breathing on the back of Victoria's neck as the pregnant woman felt chills fall down her back. She couldn't help it. She loved the feel of Joy's hands on her skin… it had been so long since they had been intimate together, but she just couldn't muster the courage to lately. Victoria began blushing at the thought.

"I didn't want this one opened in front of Elka and Melanie," Joy teased, handing Victoria her last gift and taking her own back.

"Me, either," Victoria noted, before tearing into her box.

Joy pulled out a black piece of lingerie with green trimming. The teddy was lacey down the belly, bare up the back, and silky on the breast cups and panties. It also came with stockings, which Joy adored. Victoria, on the other hand, pulled out a little red number with thin halter straps tied in a bow between the breast area. The thick lace straps would cover her breasts, and the chiffon material floated around her stomach with a slit up the middle. The panties had a matching bow on the front, and Joy pictured her as a little Christmas present.

"I think we should go try these on."

"Right now?"

Joy looked at her gently. "Yeah… c'mon, baby," she took her hand, leading her up the stairs.

"Only if you wear the boots," Victoria threw in jokingly, although her breath was caught in her chest. She was extremely nervous about what was about to happen. Normally, she didn't feel shy around Joy, but lately, her nerves just seemed to get the best of her.

Joy dressed in Victoria's bedroom while Victoria went into her bathroom. She stared at herself in the mirror and sighed. She had been struggling with her body image ever since she learned she was pregnant. She hadn't gained any weight, but she noticed the slight swelling around her stomach and she hated it. She had always tried to be thin and fit, but it was not just because she was an actress. It was because that was how her mother was when she was little, and she wanted to be just like her. She longed to be as beautiful as her mother was, but she certainly didn't feel pretty now.

The younger woman was dressed and she looked at herself in the mirror. She knew that she looked good, but she was a little concerned about her hair. She knew Victoria liked it down so she could play with it, but she often had a headache afterward when Victoria grabbed a fist-full of it in the throes of passion.

She paced around the room for a few moments, wondering what was taking Victoria so long, before asking through the door, "Honey… are you ready?"

"Just a minute!"

"Victoria, please come out. I know you look amazing."

Joy heard the door open and looked up, before becoming enchanted by the sight in front of her.

"Oh, my God…" she finally said.

"What? What's wrong?" Victoria asked, looking down, pulling the strands of fabric together to cover her stomach, thinking Joy was repulsed by the sight of her in lingerie.

"You look beautiful, Tori… stunning," Joy said, walking over to her, pulling her into a kiss.

"You look pretty good, too," Victoria breathed when they parted. "I… I don't know if I can do this, though," she admitted softly, fixating her focus on the floor. All of the sudden, the carpet pattern began to dance and she couldn't peel her eyes away.

"Why not? Do you not feel well?"

"I feel okay."

"Then what is it, honey?"

"I look fat."

Joy sighed, and took Victoria's chin into her hands, until their eyes met. "You listen to me, Victoria Chase, you haven't gained a single pound since you found out you were pregnant! You are swelling, but don't you get it? You're carrying our child! Isn't that what you wanted? To be pregnant and let our baby grow inside of you? I… I can't get pregnant, Victoria. I envy that little swell. I envy everything you get to experience…"

Victoria's eyes were glistening, but she didn't cry. "I'm so sorry, Joy. I know you wanted to have a baby, but… just because I get to experience it doesn't mean that I feel attractive anymore! I feel like everyone looks at me and thinks I'm too old to carry this baby, and they think I'm just fat.. I mean, how could a woman my age be with child?" she sniffled, as tears silently fell down her face.

"Why does it matter what anyone thinks, honey? Obviously you're not too old or you wouldn't be able to carry this baby! And you… you are the most attractive woman in the world… the most attractive person! You are glowing, and I want to show you how beautiful you are."

Victoria looked into her eyes gently, but quipped, "Let me show you, first."

"Promise me you're not going to change your mind because of this…" Joy tested, looking at her honestly.

Victoria nodded. "Okay… I promise."

The sadness between them finally met at their lips as they nearly crushed the other's. Joy's hands found their way to Victoria's bare neck, while Victoria's found their way into Joy's hair. It was beautiful, naturally wavy and down… just the way Victoria liked it.

Victoria slowly moved through Joy's hair and finally slid the straps off of Joy's shoulders, before exposing her breasts as she continued to push the material off of her lover. She began to move her kisses away from Joy's mouth and finally down to her neck. She sucked on the flesh lightly, sensually running her fingernails over Joy's nipples, causing Joy to gasp before she began to whimper. As she moved her mouth to Joy's chest, her hands continued to peel the lace from Joy's body until she was left in her panties, stockings, and new boots.

Joy was conscious enough to wiggle her way out of the outfit, and slip her panties off at the same time. She began to finger the zipper on the boots after that, and finally, she found the band on her stockings that covered her long legs.

"Keep those on," Victoria urged, with a nod.

"You think?"

Nodding again, she added, "It's extremely sexy."

With a giggle, Joy kissed her lips quickly, and laid back onto the pillows on Victoria's bed, parting her legs as much as she could for her girlfriend. Victoria licked her lips and slowly began to kiss Joy's outer thigh. She wanted to make sure Joy knew just how much she cared for her, so she planted a kiss every few centimeters up and down the outsides of both of her legs before running her lips over the insides, starting with her calves, working down to her inner knees, and finally, to her inner thighs, where she began to hear the familiar noises Joy made as she got wound up.

"Oh, Victoria, I'm ready, honey," Joy almost begged, looking at her lover pleadingly.

"Don't worry, Joy… I'll take care of you," Victoria whispered, kissing her belly with a smile. She moved her mouth down to Joy's intimate area. Victoria kissed the rosebud, dipping a finger inside carefully.

"You're awfully wet, baby…"

"Victoria!" Joy whined, knowing the voice her girlfriend used when she was holding out.

"What's wrong, sweetheart? Do you want to stop?" she teased innocently, looking up at Joy, batting her lashes. She could admit she was a tease, but she always gave into Joy. She loved Joy and would never do anything to make her want for something more.

"Please don't… I need you right now, please!"

"You need me, Joy? I'm right here…" Victoria taunted, loving the sensation that she could feel building inside herself at Joy's pleas for release. She loved watching Joy under her command… it turned her on immensely, and she knew that it had the same effect on Joy.

"Victoria! Please!" Joy almost cried, thrusting toward her a little bit.

"Oh, you want more of this," Victoria played, gently inserting a second digit, then a third before she thumbed her nub. She continued to kiss Joy's inner thigh and with her free hand, she squeezed Joy's breasts, alternating every few seconds, before finally, Joy's gutteral moans got louder and her breathing got faster.

"Oh, Tori!" Joy nearly screamed, breathing out harshly, letting out a cry of ecstacy while her muscles clentched together and she orgasmed. Victoria slowly removed her hand as Joy finished, and moved up to kiss Joy sweetly.

"You're beautiful when you come," she cooed quietly, kissing Joy's nose with love.

"Don't say that… I've seen myself orgasm before… it's far from beautiful," Joy shook her head, unable to accept the flattery. She had been in the presence of enough mirrors while having sex to know better, but when Victoria looked at her, she somehow accepted that Victoria wasn't lying.

"Fine, don't believe me… but you do look beautiful," Victoria told her, yawning a bit.

"No! You can't go to sleep yet. You're still wearing my present!"

"I thought it was my present!"

"It was more like a mutual gift that I bought for you to wear," Joy reasoned, nodding at her lover.

"I… I'm nervous," Victoria admitted, looking at Joy, almost pouting. Victoria knew that she wasn't going to give up, but she wanted so badly to just wear the outfit to bed. She knew she wanted what she just gave Joy, but she was too self-conscious to do anything about it.

"Why? Victoria… listen to me! You are beautiful, inside and out. You are going to be beautiful whether you're tiny or you're the size of an oompa-loompa, okay? Whether you get a bad spray tan or you develop an incurable albinism disease. You are Victoria Chase, my beautiful girlfriend whom I am going to ravish tonight."

"So, even though I'm fat, you think I look okay?"

"Let me show you exactly what I think of you," Joy offered, not wanting to discuss it anymore. She hated when Victoria put herself down because it was almost impossible to pull her out of that rut. Once Victoria had her mind set on something, that was usually the end.

Joy began by untying the bow that held Victoria's breasts in place.

"You know, your stomach hasn't grown much, but your boobs look much bigger to me."

"I know… they've grown a bit. That's why I've been wearing my sports bras," Victoria explained.

Joy's eyes grew as she finally got the outfit off of her. She moved her mouth to lightly kiss Victoria's nipples as she began touching her breasts, clamping down on her nipples lightly with her teeth before Victoria hissed.

"Are you okay, honey?" Joy immediately pulled away, afraid she had hurt the pregnant woman.

"They're sore still… I'm sorry."

Joy shook her head. "Don't be sorry… I'll just save all of my energy for somewhere more important," she winked at Victoria, sending a second chill down her spine.

The British woman then kissed down her stomach, stopping at her pelvic bone, planting loving kisses all over, wanting Victoria to know how much she loved that there was a baby growing inside of her. Joy's baby… their baby.

"You're beautiful," she reminded Victoria before moving further, locating Victoria's wet mound, after pulling her panties off and tossing them off the bed carelessly. She smiled, knowing what laid in front of her was all hers, and she planted kisses along the outside of her folds, before moving her tongue inside to taste Victoria.

"God…" Victoria moaned, suddenly remembering what it felt like to be intimate with Joy. It was the best feeling in the world. She felt so liberated, so loved. She also felt like she was on some sort of high… it was beyond incredible.

Grinning, Joy found her way to Victoria's sensitve bud, touching it gently as Victoria involuntarily pushed her body closer to Joy. She reached her hand down, wanting to get the show on the road, but her hand was removed by another.

Joy wasn't usually one to hold out, but since Victoria had toyed with her, Joy looked at her lover with a twinkle in her eye, one that Victoria had only seen one other time they were in bed together.

"Put your hands above your head," she commanded, taking control of the situation, "And don't move toward me."

Victoria immediately obeyed, knowing that Joy meant business tonight. She felt extremely aroused, just by the tone of voice that she used, and she bit her lip, trying to keep herself from smiling too much. She knew that Joy was serious, and liked the feeling of Joy having control over her.

"I don't want your help, so keep your hands up above your head or I'll hold them up there."

Joy's voice made Victoria quiver with excitement, and that's when Joy's lips met Victoria's pearl, kissing it lightly, before tonguing it while Victoria writhed beneathe her. She tried to hold her hips still, but she was turned on immensely and she didn't want to play anymore. She wanted Joy, and she wanted her in that exact moment.

As Joy's mouth worked under her hood, her hands began to complete giving her the entire service. She tucked two inside, pushing in, pulling out, pushing in, pulling out… the excitement combined with the sensation Victoria felt was becoming too much, and she began to tense, as her breathing quickened, as though she had been working out for an hour.

"Jesus, Joy!" she cried, tossing her head back in complete abandon, arching her back, letting Joy do whatever she wanted so that she could recieve the ultimate treatment. She felt her muscles tighten as Joy moved in and out of her, faster and faster, and when Joy nibbled at her clit, she cried out, as her orgasm hit.

"Oh, God!" she moaned, riding out the waves of her orgasm as she felt Joy's mouth move lower, until finally, she was in a state of bliss while Joy moved to kiss her cheek.

"I love you, Victoria… thank you for letting me give you the best part of your gift."

Giggling, Victoria turned her head to look at Joy. "The same goes for me, sweet girl. I love you, too."

"Merry Christmas, Tori."

"Merry Christmas, Joy."


	29. Chapter 29

The next day, Joy and Victoria spent the day together until Melanie and Elka came home. That was when Victoria went to take a nap, and Joy began helping Melanie take all of the Christmas decorations down. It was only the day after, but the girls decided to get rid of the theme around the house early so that they wouldn't end up leaving it up for too long.

"I think I'm going to go clean the bathroom," Melanie announced, putting the last ornament into the Christmas box.

The taller brunette made a face. "You're actually volunteering to do that?"

Melanie, Joy, and Victoria all had very small private bathrooms, but the bathroom in the hallway was huge. It held their washing machine and dryer, as well as the jacuzzi tub that they'd all purchased when they first moved in once they realized how cheap the rent was. It doubled as their guest bathroom, and cleaning it made Joy want to gag.

"Yeah… I'd like to take a long bath after dinner," she smiled, before snapping the container full of Christmas decorations shut, and picking it up to take to the attic. With a shrug, Joy went over to the window and noticed it was snowing. It hadn't exactly been rare that the ladies saw snow living in Ohio, but every time she saw it, Joy still got a little excited. It hadn't snowed yet that year, so she smiled, and headed upstairs to surprise Victoria with the news.

"Hey, are you awake?"

"Yeah…" Victoria said with a yawn, turning over to see Joy with a huge smile on her face. "What?"

"Come downstairs… and get your coat on!"

Confused, Victoria got out of bed and stretched, before she did as she was told. She put her slippers on, assuming Joy wanted her to do something that involved her being cold. She went downstairs and walked down the stairs to find Joy standing near the door, slipping a sneaker on.

"What are we doing?"

"C'mere," she said, grabbing her hand, leading her outside where the snow fell.

"Oh! It's snowing!" Victoria beamed, as Joy led her down the front steps carefully, in case it was slippery. She wasn't going to let anything happen to Victoria or the baby, she was sure of that. "Why are we walking in the snow?"

"Because…" Joy mused, leading her around the house before gently pushing her up against the siding. "If we were on the porch, we couldn't do this," she explained, pressing her lips to Victoria's passionately.

Meanwhile, Melanie let out a deep sigh. She had already forgotten the paper towels and had to make a trip to the kitchen, and now she couldn't find the toilet cleaner. She stood up and walked up the stairs and into her bathroom, unsuccessfully finding what she needed, before heading into Joy's room.

"Joy…" she said to herself, nearly tripping on a shoe near her bed, knocking her knee into the nightstand beside the mattress. Joy was not usually messy, but lately, she had been a little too smiley and carefree, making Melanie wonder if she was seeing someone, but she did not question her. She knew Joy would say something if and when she wanted to.

"Ouch!" she said lightly, noticing Joy's glasses had fallen to the floor in the midst of all of the nonsense. She knew that she could clumsy, but it was getting ridiculous. It wasn't just Joy's floor that had tripped her so far. She couldn't even clean the bathroom without struggling for ten minutes first!

Melanie shook her head to herself and with another deep sigh, she kicked the shoe out of the way and bent down to pick up Joy's glasses. She opened the nightstand drawer to put them inside, safe from any other harm she or Joy might accidentally do because of their lack of grace, and moved to close it, but it was stuck.

"Really?!" she asked loudly, to no one in particular, just putting it into the universe to get it out of her system. She reached in and pushed down on the obstruction, and pulled her hand back out, but it was stuck to something.

She looked down before moving to put the item back in the drawer, and recognized by the material against her skin that it was a picture, which is why her skin stuck to it in the first place. She noticed that it wasn't just any normal picture, though, it was an ultra sound photo.

Figuring it was Owen's ultra sound picture, Melanie went to place it back in it's home, but noticed the date. "What the hell?" she asked herself, sitting down on the bed so her knees didn't give out. It was only from about a month ago. She looked at it carefully, running her fingers over the tiny fetus on the picture.

Why didn't Joy tell her she was pregnant, she wondered to herself? Was this why she had been so happy? Why didn't she want to share the excitement with her friends? She sadly looked at the photograph and then noticed the name on it.

"What the fuck…" Melanie asked herself, seeing "Victoria Chase" printed on the top of the photograph. Now she was angry instead of sad. Both Joy and Victoria kept this from her! She stood up with a harsh frown and went downstairs, just as she saw Joy and Victoria walk back inside with each other, laughing as they took their footwear off.

"Did you get the bathroom clean?" Joy asked with a grin, seeing her friend on the stair case.

"No, because I couldn't find the cleaning product that I let you use last week… but I guess that wasn't the only thing you were keeping from me, was it?" Melanie nearly exploded. Steam rose within her system and she needed to release it or she was going to erupt.

Victoria's eyes widened in surprise, as did Joy's. They hadn't seen her this angry since she found out Anders was back together with Kim. The noticed the flush of her cheeks and the look on her face, but they also heard the firey scowl escape Melanie's lips with her words.

"What? Mel, I don't understand…" Joy said lightly, wondering what in the world was going on. Her last thought was that she found out about the pregnancy.

"Yeah, well I don't understand why you both kept this from me, either!" she showed them the picture from the ultra sound, as they both turned to look at each other, with guilt ridden expressions.


	30. Chapter 30

Melanie sat in the chair closest to the door, crying over Victoria and Joy's betrayal. They kept a huge secret from her, and it made her feel like the wasn't important enough to be considered their best friend uncomfortably sat on the couch, not close to Melanie, while Joy went to get Elka.

"This really isn't what you think, Melanie," Victoria tried to sooth, not knowing what else to say to the woman.

"Just stop! I know exactly what I found!" she almost yelled at her friend, before Joy and Elka came in through the kitchen door. She looked up, wiping her eyes again.

"You couldn't have just told me whatever you needed to tell me when Max got me home? I was just about to get into my Snuggie!" Elka complained, taking a seat on the couch next to Victoria as Joy sat down in the chair closest to the kitchen. Elka looked over when she heard a sniffle and made a face. "And why are you crying?"

"Because!" Melanie cried, holding out the picture for Elka to take.

"You're pregnant?" Elka asked, moments after looking it over carefully. She wasn't really sure why Melanie was upset, but she was shocked when she saw the name was Victoria's. She thought, perhaps, Joy was pregnant, or maybe Melanie was upset because she was pregnant, but Victoria? Victoria hadn't even dated lately! Elka wanted to laugh at the brief thought that maybe Victoria really was a hooker!

Nodding her head, Victoria confirmed, "Fourteen weeks today."

"But you're too old to be pregnant!"

"Elka," Joy warned gently, not wanting to upset Victoria anymore than she already was. Victoria was already having self-image issues, and she certainly did not want to push those limits anymore than they had already been. Joy tried her best to protect her, but she knew words still got to Victoria.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Melanie demanded angrily, glaring at Victoria, not bothering to listen to Elka and Joy bicker. "Why didn't you tell me when you told Joy? Am I not your best friend, too?"

"Mel, it's not like that," Joy began looking to Victoria gently. "It wasn't like she trusted me and didn't trust you…"

"Then what's it like, Joy? Huh? Because I didn't have her ultra sound picture in my drawer next to my bed!"

"Listen, Melanie, I promise that it's not-"

"No! Don't sugar coat it! Just tell me! Tell me why you got to know and I didn't! Why did Victoria tell you and then give you her picture to hold onto? I just don't understand why I am the last to know!"

"Because it's Joy's baby!" Victoria said, as Melanie's eyes widened at what Victoria said. She didn't know how to take in what the pregnant woman said. She thought for a moment that perhaps she had heard Victoria wrong, it was just her mind playing tricks on her, but she didn't think so. Maybe, though, she should double check.

"What?"

"What?" Elka asked simultaneously.

Victoria gave an apologetic look to Joy and took her hand. "Joy wanted to tell you I was pregnant after we had the ultra sound, but I was so scared, and I made her wait. But Joy only knows because it's her baby… our baby. We're… we're together. We're in love with each other," Victoria explained to the other women in the room. She expected a reaction, but she didn't get one.

Elka and Melanie sat silently.

Finally it broke. "Are you fucking kidding me?" Melanie finally asked, "You're a couple now? So, not only did you hide your pregnancy from me, but you've been hiding your relationship, too? God, I'm so glad we're such good friends!" she yelled, standing up angrily.

"Mel, please don't go," Joy stood up, too, going after her as Melanie was headed for the door. She didn't want her to leave, and more importantly, she didn't want Melanie to hate her for loving Victoria. One of her worst fears was losing her friends because of her relationship. If Melanie hated her because of this, it would break her heart.

"Don't touch me! Don't! And don't you dare wait up for me because I'm not coming home!" she growled as she went to leave, slamming the door behind her.

Joy stood at the door for a moment, taking in the sight of the paint and the glass. She felt her chin begin to tremble, and she tried to hold back the tears, but she couldn't. She didn't want to, but she finally turned around with tears streaming down her face, embarrassed that she was crying.

"Oh, c'mere," Victoria offered, holding out her arms for the woman that she loved. She held Joy tight as she cried into her shoulder as Elka watched on.

She reached out and held Victoria's hand supportively and said, "If it makes you feel any better, I'm glad you're having a baby."

"You are?" Victoria asked, looking at Elka with a small, yet surprised smile. She wasn't expecting Melanie's reaction, but she certainly wasn't expecting Elka's, either.

"Yeah. I kind of hoped someone would have a kid, but I figured it would be Melanie… she's kind of easy now, you know," she teased, wanting to lighten the situation just a little bit.

Victoria smiled, almost pouting her lip. She could not have been more grateful for the elderly woman in that moment. "That means a lot, Elka."

"It's gonna mean a lot if I get to be the grandmother, too," she hinted with a wink.

"You want to be the grandmother of my baby?" Joy mumbled into Victoria's shoulder.

"Yeah… even if it is your kid, Joy. I'm just hoping it's a boy."

The foreigner turned around to look at Elka, confused, but unable to stop herself from grinning. "Why?"

"So he won't dress like either of you!"

Victoria and Joy couldn't help but laugh. Clearly, their news had not changed Elka, and that pleased both of them. It made them feel normal. "If he's gay, he'll love the way we dress."

"Oh, God help us all!"


	31. Chapter 31

Later that night, when Joy and Victoria got ready for bed, Victoria noticed something was off about her partner. Something in the way she walked, the way she stayed silent, and even in the way carried her shoes up the stairs to dry on the heater from playing outside in the snow before the Melanie showdown happened.

"Hey, sweetie… is everything okay?" she asked gently, not knowing whether or not to push the subject yet. Usually, she wanted to talk about things, but she knew that Joy was one to keep her feelings hidden. She knew that Joy hated confronting how she felt, but it wasn't like they hadn't been through this a few times in their relationship, not to mention, their friendship.

"No, not exactly."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I just wish we had told Melanie sooner…" she sighed, sitting down on the bed, opposite Victoria. She didn't want to be too close to her because she felt hurt. "I am worried she's going to hate us for a long time because of this."

"Honey, she still would have felt betrayed no matter when we told her. It's not your fault," Victoria soothed, reaching over, rubbing her arm.

Joy pulled away as if Victoria had some sort of flesh eating virus she was trying to spread. "You don't know that! You don't know how she would've reacted had we told her sooner! All you know is that you got your way; you didn't have to tell her!"

"Joy! That's not fair…"

"Neither was Melanie finding out the way she did! Jesus, Victoria, the woman's been our closest friend for thirty years now, we should've told her!"

"Joy-" Victoria moved to get up, wanting Joy to come sit back down with her.

"Don't! Don't touch me right now!" Joy spewed. "We hurt our best friend because you didn't want to tell her about us or the baby! You were right when you said it wasn't my fault, it was yours. You did this! If she doesn't come home because of you, Victoria…" Joy warned, shaking her head, letting Victoria imagine what Joy might do.

"Sweetheart, she will come around. I promise. She just needs time to take in the news," Victoria said, trying to be as nice as she possibly could. She knew stress wasn't good for the baby, and she knew that Joy didn't mean what she was saying. She knew it was her fault, but it stung that Joy blamed her for Melanie's reaction. It wasn't like she wanted Melanie to be upset… she was just scared to tell her.

"And what if she doesn't? I never wanted to risk our friendship, or our friendship with Melanie, for a relationship. I love you, but I love Melanie, and I need her friendship, Victoria."

"So, what, if she doesn't come home, you don't want to be with me?" Victoria nearly laughed at the insanity.

"I didn't say that, but I don't know anymore."

Victoria shook her head. "Fine. I think you need some time to cool off. I'm sleeping in my own bedroom tonight," she said, grabbing her pillows from Joy's bed and moving to leave. "I just hope you remember who's carrying your baby."

"Yeah, the same woman that didn't want to tell anyone about that baby," Joy muttered to herself, walking over to the door and slamming it shut in frustration. She sat down on her bed and cried to herself, finally giving into her emotions. She hadn't done it in a while, and it felt so good to let it all out.

She was so upset with Victoria, but she was more upset with herself. She knew that she let Victoria talk her into keeping their relationship and pregnancy hidden, and she should have known that it was not the right choice. Her gut kept telling her to do the right thing, to tell her friends about her and Victoria.

Afterall, they were happy together. They were having a baby together! She had never been so happy, honestly, and she wasn't sure why Victoria wanted to keep that bottled up, but it was killing her now that she went along with it.

Meanwhile, Victoria went into her room and got into bed angrily, before turning off the lamp on her nightstand. She reminded herself that Joy needed time to cool off, but that didn't stop her mind from racing. If Melanie didn't come home, what would become of her and Joy? Would their relationship survive? Would Joy even want to be with her? What would happen if Joy decided not to be with her?

God, she had to stop. She knew that Melanie just needed a little space right now, but she felt terrible. She knew that she had hurt Melanie, and she hurt Joy, too.

Before anything else could be thought up, there was a knock at the door.


	32. Chapter 32

"Unless it's Melanie, go away!" Victoria yelled at the door, before turning over to face the opposite side in her bed. She didn't want to be bothered by anyone, she just wanted to go to sleep… she needed some space from Joy and she needed to figure out what she was going to do to help Melanie feel okay again.

"It's not Melanie, but I'm still coming in," Joy told her as she walked into Victoria's bedroom, shutting the door behind her. She moved over to Victoria's bed, climbing in behind Victoria and running her fingers through the other woman's hair. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" the older woman asked, upset by what Joy had said earlier. She didn't want to be rude, but her hormones were acting up, and she was feeling hurt about Joy saying that she'd rather be friends with Melanie than be romantic with her. She was also feeling defensive because she knew she had been the one to hurt Joy.

"For saying what I said. I never want to leave you, Tori… never. Even if Melanie didn't come home, I wouldn't want to leave you and I'm sorry for implying that," the woman explained, continuing to rake Victoria's hair.

Victoria said nothing, she simply backed up into Joy's slender figure and let Joy hold her.

"Are you still mad?"

"No… are you? I… I never meant to hurt Melanie, or you… I was trying to protect us. I knew this would happen, and I was scared to let anything come between us. We haven't fought since we found out we were pregnant, and I didn't want there to be a chance that anything could break us up."

"Of course it's not going to break us up, honey. I love you."

"I love you, too," Victoria nodded against her.

"So, until Melanie gets home, we'll just have to make sure that we work on being even more honest with each other. I should have told you I wasn't okay with waiting… I didn't, though, and I'm sorry."

"Sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry for. I shouldn't have made you wait."

Joy smiled, kissing her hair. "I guess, at least we have to be thankful that Elka was supportive. I didn't expect it from her, but I suppose I should have known when she said that she didn't care if you dated a woman or not."

"I think I somehow knew Elka wouldn't be upset. She loves you so much, Joy…"

"She loves you, too," she nuzzled against her girlfriend.

Victoria nodded, and then sighed. "I hope Melanie's alright…"

"I do, too." Joy whispered, wrapping her arm around Victoria.

"I know she's probably with Hank… I just wish I knew for sure."

"I'm sorry for saying it was your fault, sweetheart, I didn't mean it. Try not to think about it."

"Thanks for trying to make me feel better, but it was my fault. I shouldn't have waited… we should have told her sooner."

"We have to tell our parents and our kids, too."

"I know… but let's deal with this crisis first."

Joy just held her hand supportively until they both fell asleep.

The next morning, Victoria awoke to Joy bringing her breakfast in bed, and they shared it together.

"You make much better pancakes than I do…"

"I know," Joy said with a smile, taking a bite of the fluffy sweetness, loving how it tasted in her mouth. She loved that she and Victoria both loved pancakes so much, and especially since Victoria had begun having cravings, it was a weekend ritual for them to share a plate of them, secretly or now.

"Thanks for breakfast."

"You're welcome, Tori. Maybe we could go for a walk today, what do you think?"

"If it's not too cold… I wonder if it's snowed anymore."

"I'll go check and take these with me," she smiled, getting up, taking the tray with the empty plate and cups with her. "I'll be right back," Joy promised before disappearing out of the room.

If there was one thing Victoria was happy about, it was that she and Joy could now openly spend the night together. They wouldn't have to worry about sneaking around anymore or being careful about the names they called each other, or having to double check that they sent each other a risque text and not Melanie. It would be easier now.

Victoria sat in her bed for nearly ten minutes before she finally got up and put her robe on to see what was going on downstairs. When she made her way to the kitchen, she saw three women sitting around the table.

"Melanie?"


	33. Chapter 33

I am SO sorry. I meant to get this chapter up earlier this week, but my uncle passed away on Tuesday, & I have completely let that take over my life in an awful way. I love you all & appreciate your patience3 Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoy (:

Melanie looked up behind her and gave Victoria a small smile. It was clear that she had been crying, and from the looks of it, Joy had been crying, too. Joy stood up and gave Victoria a hug, as Victoria rubbed her back lightly, trying to offer some comfort. She hated to see Joy cry.

"It's okay," she soothed gently, before Joy nodded and sat back down and Victoria hugged Melanie.

"I'm sorry…" the shorter woman whispered to her friend.

"You don't have to be sorry, Mel," Victoria promised, with a gentle smile. She knew how Melanie felt, and she felt horrible that she had hurt her friend, even if she didn't mean make her feel that way.

"Yes I do," Melanie nodded, as they both sat down. "I shouldn't have reacted the way I did… I didn't mean to make it seem like I was against your relationship, because I'm not. I was hurt you didn't tell me, not that you two found happiness together."

"We should've told you…"

"But I wouldn't let Joy. She wanted to, but I was scared. If you are mad at anyone, Melanie, it should be me," Victoria said firmly. She wouldn't let Joy take the blame for this when she knew that it was her decision that cause Melanie to get upset.

Melanie shook her head before touching both Joy and Victoria's hands. "I'm not mad at anyone… I felt betrayed, but I realized that I did the same thing to you when I started talking to Hank again. I was shocked, too… but I'm not mad."

Victoria couldn't help but feel a genuine tug at her lips. "Thank you, Melanie. Thank you so much."

"Can I ask a question, though?"

"Sure, anything," Joy nodded, looking at Melanie carefully. It was time to be open and honest with her friend, and Victoria would just have to be honest, too.

"How did you… how did you two get together? How long have you been together? And, oh, my God, how did you keep it a secret?" Melanie asked with wide eyes. She was curious, and she was shocked that she hadn't seen them being a couple. She hadn't seen them so much as give each other a glance that she thought was overly friendly. She certainly had no idea about the pregnancy, either. She wanted to know how they did it, and the women both they owed her that much.

"It's kind of a funny story," Joy smiled, glancing over at Victoria, remembering how it all started. She remembered the night before Elka was found when she and Victoria had it out. She absolutely lost it on Victoria, but she deserved it. She hadn't realized it then, but the underlying issue was that she had unresolved feelings for Victoria.

"Remember that fight Joy and I had months ago? Right after Elka ran away?" Victoria cut in with a grin, also remembering what had happened. She ran away from the house after countless tries to get Joy to talk to her, and then, out of the blue, Joy showed up at her hotel room in the middle of the night. It was better than any romantic movie she had been a part of.

"Hey! I was trying to run away so I didn't have to spend the rest of my life in prison with Joy!" Elka defended herself, shaking her head. "Thank God the governor's wife pardoned us… otherwise I'd still be behind bars!"

"Well, anyway, before I brought Victoria home, she told me she loved me and I sort of realized that I loved her, too…"

"And we kept it a secret because… because we weren't sure if it would work out or how you would react," Victoria explained, looking to both Elka and Melanie. "So, we wanted to tell you after Thanksgiving, but I was so scared. Joy was so sweet and told me we could wait, so that's why we didn't tell you… I was scared."

Melanie smiled at both of the women. "I forgive you… and I'm so glad I know now."

"But aren't you too old to carry a baby? Isn't it dangerous?" Elka asked, looking at Victoria seriously. She hadn't meant to offend her, she was simply curious about the actress.

Victoria looked down at her lap. This was what she feared most. She hated people thinking she was too old to carry Joy's baby. The doctor had cleared her, and she was still healthy… there was no reason why she couldn't birth their child! Joy looked over, noticing Victoria's reaction, and put her arm around her gently.

"No, it's not dangerous. We had all of the necessary proceedures done, and she's very healthy. I can't carry a child to term, but since Victoria's done it three times, the doctor thinks she should be okay."

"Well, you look too old!" Elka tried to lighten the mood. It didn't work.

Joy sighed, almost feeling the hurt that Elka's words inflicted upon Victoria. "The doctor wants Victoria to be careful with stress, so let's lay off the jokes about her until she has the baby, at least," Joy warned, before looking back to Melanie. She needed to change the subject. "We have something we want to talk to you about… regarding the house."

"Oh, no… I can't afford to pay the rent on my own! Maybe in the beginning, but now…" she shook her head, unsure of what she was going to do. What if she got kicked out and had no where to go? "Maybe I could move in with Hank, but we both agreed to take it slow, so I don't know-"

"No, no, Mel, we don't want to move out and we don't want you to, either!" Victoria interrupted, shaking her head, glad to have a new distraction. She didn't want Melanie to be upset over nothing, though.

"No, I mean, unless you want to, or want us to… in which case we'd understand," Joy said, before adding, "But we were actually thinking about turning my room into the nursery and paying a little extra rent, you know, when the baby comes."

"Oh, wow… I'm okay with that. But if you wanted me to move out, I would understand. I don't think Hank would mind, especially considering the circumstances."

"Well, whatever you want to do is fine, Mel. We'd love to have you here, but we wouldn't mind visiting you at Hank's house, either."

"As long as I get to stay where I am, I don't care what you people do," Elka announced, rolling her eyes at the women. She stood up and said, "I'm happy you're happy, but I've got shit to do today… I'll see ya," she told them before leaving.

The ladies all appreciated the lightness Elka added to the situation in the end, but they were all relieved when she left, too.

"She wants to be the grandmother," Victoria shook her head with a smile, happy to hear the door close. She loved Elka dearly, but her words stung.

"As long as I get to be the aunt," Melanie teased, as they all laughed at the brunette mocking the elderly woman who'd just walked out.


	34. Chapter 34

I know that I'm the worst updater in the world… I'm sorry.

The next couple of months flew by. By the time they knew it, it was the week of Valentine's Day. Joy and Victoria had Skyped their four children at once to announce their relationship and their pregnancy, and although they were all a bit surprised, they told Joy and Victoria that they would support them. They held off on telling their parents, though, and Victoria made her kids promise they wouldn't say anything to her father. She knew she was not ready yet, and Joy felt unprepared, too.

Elka and Max had been down in Florida since the end of January, and they were not planning on coming back until March, and Hank had surprised Melanie with a two week cruise to the Bahamas. They were planning on meeting up with Elka and Max before flying home near the end of the month, leaving Joy and Victoria home alone for two weeks.

"Are you excited for Valentine's Day tomorrow?" Victoria purred, cuddling in bed with Joy. She had gained some weight, but she was still relatively small for being almost five months pregnant. She had her fingers laced through her girlfriend's, and she enjoyed how they felt resting on her baby bump.

"No… it's a horrid holiday."

"Oh, I thought we were going to celebrate," Victoria said flatly.

Joy sighed. "I told you I didn't want to do anything."

"Yeah, well, I thought you were just saying that."

"No… I'm really not all about the holiday," she said bitterly, letting go of Victoria's hand.

"Okay," Victoria said, scooting over to her own side of the bed.

She knew Joy was upset about something, so she decided to decorate the house the next day while Joy was at work. She hung up paper hearts on the wall, hung them from the ceiling, and even got little chocolate cupcakes with pink frosting and sprinkle hearts from the store.

Victoria worked hard to get the house festive, and when Joy got home, she nearly got caught in the streamers that Victoria had put up over the door.

"Victoria Elise!"

Victoria peeked her head in though the kitchen door, almost nervously, when she heard Joy use her middle name. Joy only used it when she was really mad, but since she did all of this work, she was sure that Joy was using it because she was so excited… right?

"I'm glad you're home, sweetheart. I just ordered dinner," she smiled, looking at the woman who had just gotten home from work. "What's wrong?"

"I thought we agreed not to celebrate Valentine's Day."

"No… you said you didn't want to celebrate, but I think you got upset last night when I left it alone," Victoria explained, walking over to wrap her hands around Joy.

"Don't you dare touch me!" Joy flinched, moving away from the actress. "No! I told you how I felt about today and you ignored me, as usual. It always has to be your way, Victoria!"

"Joy, what are you talking about? I just wanted to do something nice for you!" Victoria cried, looking at her, as her heart broke into pieces. She couldn't believe that Joy was acting like this, especially she put so much effort into her plan.

"No! You wanted to do what you wanted to do, just like you always do!" Joy screamed before storming off, upstairs. Victoria sat down, sadly on the couch, and began to cry at the same time Joy was crying in her bedroom.

Victoria decided, though, to just get rid of any reminder of the night, and began to take the decorations down. She tossed paper hearts in the garbage, along with the streamers she had hung up earlier. She even put the cupcakes in the garbage, knowing she wasn't going to eat them now that Joy had made a huge fuss over everything.

She got done undecorating the downstairs, almost an hour later, and went upstairs. She knocked softly on Joy's door and when Joy asked her "what?", she opened the door.

"Are you coming to bed?"

"I'm not sleeping in your room tonight."

"Why not?"

"I saw that you decorated it."

"I'll take it down."

Joy turned away from her. "I just want to sleep by myself."

"Will you at least tell me what you did wrong?" Victoria asked, looking at her gently.

"Goodnight, Victoria."

With a sigh, Victoria turned to leave the room. She knew it was no use pushing her to talk, because she was already angry. Besides, it might be nice to sleep by herself, especially since she was upset with Joy for her attitude. So, she went into her room and did just that.

Joy, however, didn't sleep very much that night. She was very upset, and knew that first thing in the morning, she had to go to therapy before she completely broke down. She couldn't handle the stupid holiday, and quite frankly, she didn't need any kind of reminder. Why couldn't Victoria just have listened to her when she protested the night before? All she wanted was to forget that it was Valentine's Day, and now, it was all she was thinking about.


	35. Chapter 35

When Joy woke up the next morning, she bolted out of the house before Victoria was awake and headed straight to her therapist's office. It wasn't even open, but she sat in her car, blasting the heat while she waited. Finally, it was time to make an emergency session, and when she got inside, she headed right in to talk to her doctor.

"Hey, is everything okay? Are Victoria and the baby alright?" the woman, Dr. Jennifer Elliot asked, walking Joy into her office.

Nodding, Joy said, "Victoria's fine and so is the baby."

"Alright, so tell me what the emergency is, then."

The brunette sighed. "I asked Victoria specifically not to celebrate Valentine's Day and I got home to her celebrating… I mean decorations, food, flowers… the whole shebang! I ask for one thing and she can't listen to me!"

"Joy… did you tell her why you don't celebrate Valentine's Day?"

"That's not the point! The point is, she doesn't listen to me! She drives me crazy! She just seems to do whatever she wants no matter what!"

The therapist shook her head. "Take a breath and listen to me. You are upset about the holiday. If you really felt that Victoria never listens to you, you wouldn't be with her. You would have awkwardly broken up with her and you two wouldn't even communicate anymore… trust me."

Joy shrugged. "You are the expert."

"I want you to go home and talk to Victoria about it."

A pause.

"I don't know it I can," Joy's voice almost broke, as she looked up at the woman who was sitting across from her.

"Yes you can. It's been over twenty years and you have a baby on the way. You can and need to talk to your partner about this."

Joy grabbed a tissue to dab at her eyes. Even after all of those years, the topic still made Joy weepy. She knew that she had to do exactly what Jennifer was saying… even if it broke her heart. She had to tell Victoria why she was so upset… and she had to apologize.

"I know Victoria was just trying to make the day special."

Jennifer nodded. "You're right, I think she was. I think she wanted to surprise you. Because she didn't know, she thought she was making you happy, Joy."

Joy bit her lip. "I guess I should go home and apologize…"

"That sounds like a plan to me. If you have trouble or need me to help, give me a call or come back by," Jennifer gave her patient a soft smile.

"Thank you."

Later that day, Joy found Victoria taking decorations down in her bredroom when she got home. "Can we talk?" she asked, upon entering the room. She felt bad seeing a pregnant Victoria struggling, but she knew that she was the one who put the decorations up.

"Why in the world would you want to do that? You couldn't talk to me last night… nothing's changed since then?"

"I'm willing to talk," Joy offered softly, causing Victoria to turn and look at her.

"Then talk," Victoria gave in, turning her attention back to the decorations she was practically ripping down and throwing into the trash can.

"I went to therapy this morning, Tori, and we spoke about the holiday disaster. There's a reason why I hate Valentine's Day so much, I never shared that with you, and that is my fault. I shouldn't have been so hard on you and I should have told you how much I appreciate the gesture. But I was so blinded by my anger… and you didn't deserve any of it."

Victoria stopped what she was doing to look at Joy. "Will you tell me what made you hate Valentine's day so much?"

Joy sighed before she walked over to the bed to sit down. She was upset about having to tell Victoria the truth, and she hated herself for not saying anything until now. She also hated having to talk about it with everything they had been through in the past couple of months.

"Joy?" Victoria asked gently, following her.

"Remember when we you, Melanie, and I met and we went down to Mexico together right after Kyle called off the wedding?"

"How could I forget?"

"Well, remember how when we were down there, I'd gotten my period and I was a wreck for the better half of the trip?"

"Sort of… but you told Melanie and me that it was just because of Kyle… but you wouldn't lay out in the sun with us until the end of our trip," she nodded, recalling the events from nearly thirty years ago in her mind.

"Well, the truth is, I was pregnant, and I miscarried. It was on Valentine's Day and every time the dreadful day rolls around, all I can think about is how Kyle broke up with me and I lost my child… I didn't tell you and Melanie because I didn't ever want to talk about it. But my therapist made me see that it was important for you to know."

Victoria, with tears in her eyes, just hugged Joy tightly. "Oh, God… I am sorry, baby… I am so sorry. I wish I had known…"

Joy shook her head. "It's not your fault. I wish I had told you sooner… I just couldn't."

Nodding, Victoria just held Joy. "I know, but I'm still sorry. I… it's stupid to celebrate Valentine's Day anyway. There's no reason to show you how much I love you on Valentine's Day when I don't put that much effort to every other day of the year. So, from now on, I'm going to make our anniversary special instead."

Joy smiled. "You are perfect, you know that, right?"

"Yes, but I do like to hear it every once in a while," Victoria teased.

Joy kissed her cheek and then proceeded to help her take the rest of the decorations down.


End file.
